It was meant to be a delightful day at the park. I had eagerly anticipated taking my son to this lovely spot ever since spring brought its warmth and the flowers began to bloom. I chose a straightforward hike that was manageable, even for a 4-year-old. Sure, there were a few inclines, but nothing too daunting. The reward was magnificent — a stunning waterfall spilling into a glistening pool, framed by the gentle allure of birch and oak trees. I was confident my son would handle it well, and he did.
However, I completely overlooked my own physical condition. By the time we reached the first hill, I was gasping for breath. My heart raced, my calves were protesting, and oh no — was that my lower back giving me grief?
As I trudged along, it became painfully clear that my physical fitness had significantly declined over the years. Back in my younger days (before marriage and kids), I never imagined I’d be dealing with these daily aches and pains. Clearly, the life I envisioned “in the middle” is quite different from my current reality.
Sandwiched between the hopeful beginnings of young adulthood and the serene pleasures of retirement, so much of life can feel like, “Well, that’s not how I pictured it.”
1. Friendships
Just the other day, I glanced at my calendar and realized that I haven’t had a meaningful catch-up with a friend in ages. How did that happen?
2. Physical Health
Playing with my kids has become increasingly challenging. My knees protest, and my back is a constant reminder of my limitations. Sometimes, I push myself a bit too hard, and as I struggle to catch my breath, I’m nostalgic for the energy I had just a few years ago. Is it just me?
3. Energy Levels
I’m perpetually exhausted. Sleep doesn’t really rejuvenate me; it just dulls the fatigue. It’s not just tiredness; it’s a deep weariness. Weary from the never-ending pile of laundry, the three birthday gifts I still have to buy, and yes, the dog just had an unfortunate accident on my freshly cleaned carpet. Yep, I’m weary.
4. Romance and Passion
I still enjoy dates with my partner, and we’ve settled into a cozy routine. But when a memory pops up on my social media showing us joyfully splashing in the ocean, it strikes me how our relationship once sparkled with passion. We used to have so much fun!
5. Career
Most of us have spent enough time at our jobs to rack up a few accomplishments, yet it feels like an eternity before we can even chat with a retirement advisor. Meanwhile, we endure countless tedious meetings, dramatic posturing, and the endless wait to see who will snag a promotion or bonus. Sure, we’d love to quit, but binge-watching our favorite shows doesn’t pay the bills, does it?
6. Finances
And speaking of bills, let’s just say finances are… a bit tricky. Balancing braces for the kids, travel soccer fees, and my 11-year-old’s phone plan while discovering a busted sewage line is quite the juggling act!
The early years are thrilling, and the later ones are meant to be savored. But what about this phase we call middle age? Are we simply meant to endure this messy middle in hopes that something better is on the horizon? Or can we discover joy, excitement, and contentment even when life feels monotonous, chaotic, and occasionally lonely?
I believe we can. Middle age is a bridge between youthful aspirations and the tranquility of retirement. Those of us “in the middle” can appreciate the thrill of youth while peeking at the comforts that lie ahead. If we allow it, this can be a wonderful gift.
The beauty of middle age is that we can find happiness in the everyday. We can embrace joy, even in the tears. We lean into the chaos and savor the moments of excitement. We find comfort in solitude and use it to ground ourselves.
Sure, I overdid it on that spring hike with my son. But honestly, it was worth it. We reached the waterfall, and as I eased myself onto a fallen log by the water’s edge, soothing my tired calves, I couldn’t help but smile. My son was having an absolute blast! His joy lifted my spirits, so we lingered a bit longer. As he tossed pebbles into the pool, I closed my eyes and soaked in the sound of the cascading water.
I might be “in the middle,” but the steep climb is finished. Going downhill should be easier, right? Well, either way, there’s always Advil.
Summary
Life “in the middle” can sometimes feel overwhelming, marked by the challenges of friendships, physical health, energy levels, romance, career frustrations, and financial strains. However, this phase also offers a unique opportunity to find joy amidst chaos and to appreciate the everyday moments that make life special.