Updated: Aug. 21, 2023
Originally Published: March 23, 2013
A few years ago, I found myself in a bit of a fashion phase where skirts dominated my wardrobe. Growing up, I was a total tomboy, preferring the comfort of t-shirts and jeans to any dress. But in my late 20s, I felt compelled—probably influenced by what I saw online—to embrace a more traditionally feminine image. I donned skirts, pretty blouses, and heels, thinking that this was how I should present myself as a woman.
I enjoyed the compliments about my outfits and the length of my hair—because, evidently, short hair isn’t considered feminine. My partner was on board with my new look, which is always a bonus. However, despite the positive feedback, I couldn’t shake the feeling that I was being inauthentic.
Since becoming a mother, I’ve unearthed my true self.
My authentic self sports a short, vibrant red haircut, often styled into a faux hawk during the summer. I gravitate towards blue jeans and black tank tops, even if they make my already fair complexion look even paler. I prefer dark eye makeup when I choose to wear any, even though the “no makeup” trend seems to be all the rage. And when it comes to footwear, give me knee-high black boots over heels any day.
I’ve come to reject the idea that I must conform to societal norms just because I’m a woman. I want to feel like a badass, and all these choices—my hair, my style, my makeup—contribute to that feeling. When I embrace my badassery, I feel empowered, capable of tackling whatever life throws my way. When I look in the mirror and think, “You look fantastic,” my mood lifts, and I’m more likely to spread that positivity to my husband, kids, and friends.
While I may not fit the traditional mold, when I lean into my authentic self, I feel like the most incredible woman on earth. It’s not about abandoning dresses and heels if that’s what you love—it’s about doing whatever it takes to feel like the warrior you truly are.
Find what makes you feel powerful, whether that’s a red faux hawk like mine or something entirely different. Embrace it without shame or fear of judgment. Society is full of those trying to fit in, but as a mother, I have neither the time nor the energy for that nonsense.
Be a badass.
If you’re interested in exploring more about self-identity and motherhood, check out this insightful post as well. And if you’re considering your options for family planning, Make A Mom offers reliable at-home insemination kits. For a comprehensive guide on pregnancy and insemination, Johns Hopkins Medicine is an excellent resource.
In summary, finding your authentic self is key to feeling empowered, especially in the whirlwind of motherhood. Embrace what makes you feel strong and confident, and don’t shy away from being the badass you truly are.
Leave a Reply