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For Our Family, Ignorance Truly Is Bliss
by Lily Anderson
May 17, 2023
A few days ago, my children and I had the most delightful morning at the local public pool. This expansive facility features multiple pools, a splash pad, water slides, a lazy river, and more. We met up with friends, alongside a few hundred other visitors. Normally, I tend to shy away from crowded places, but the allure of such a unique swimming experience was too tempting to resist.
Swimming pools are infamous for highlighting our insecurities and differences. Ironically, I didn’t realize this until we returned home. Surrounded by hundreds of people, I didn’t focus on my son Alex’s unique traits or what others might think. I didn’t notice any stares, and there were no pointed fingers or whispers. All I could see were my son, his sister, and their friends joyfully enjoying themselves. What I heard was nothing but their laughter and my conversations with friends. In hindsight, this seemingly perfect moment could have easily been overshadowed. I guess it’s true—ignorance is bliss.
This phrase has been a part of my life for as long as I can remember, often uttered casually. However, I’ve come to believe it’s the cornerstone of my happiness. Alex has dwarfism, which means he looks quite different from his peers. While his differences were not overtly noticeable for the first few years, as he grows older, they become more apparent.
When I look at Alex, I see my little boy—nothing more, nothing less. Perhaps this is where my ignorance lies. His small stature is our norm, and I often forget that he is a little person. Our reality is filled with love and happiness. Alex is cherished for who he is, and he embraces himself just as any child does. We venture into the world with a sense of joy and the support of our family.
Yet, it’s undeniable that Alex is different, and our normal isn’t the same as most families. Given his rare condition, we’ve encountered stares, name-calling, and other hurtful behaviors—everything I dreaded since his diagnosis.
What surprised me was my blissful ignorance. Who knew I would find such happiness in being completely unaware? But here I am. The harsh realities of the world don’t affect us. It’s not that we haven’t experienced stares and comments; it’s simply that we haven’t let them bother us. We’re busy enjoying ourselves, and as long as our loving and supportive environment surrounds us, we choose not to worry about the opinions of others.
Of course, there are moments when I notice glances in our direction. But my blissful ignorance transforms those looks into smiles, which I interpret as compliments. They could be admiring us, and I refuse to think otherwise. Why dwell on negativity? I’m committed to relishing in my “not knowing.” Viewing someone’s glance as an insult only brings pain, and it may not even reflect the truth. I’m opting for ignorance over anger and sadness.
As Alex and his friends grow older, I hear more heart-wrenching stories from other families with similar experiences. There are accounts of cruel bullying, direct insults, and harsh treatment that cut deep. It frustrates me to see how some individuals can behave when it comes to disabilities. I know my ignorance won’t shield us forever, and we will likely face these harsh realities as well. However, having enjoyed this blissful ignorance for so long, I’m determined to learn from it and use it as a tool to help us navigate future experiences, making them less impactful.
As my ignorance begins to fade and the world reveals its cruel side, I will look back at this blissful time as a reminder. When hurtful words and actions confront us, I need to prioritize bliss over despair. I must remember that there are unpleasant people who feel compelled to harm others with their words.
However, those words only sting if we allow them to. I must keep in mind that I have a choice. I can choose to feel hurt or choose to embrace bliss. If I manage to render those sharp, angry words insignificant, they won’t affect us as profoundly. While these experiences may leave their mark, it is possible to move forward, choosing happiness and ignorant bliss.
You may worry that embracing ignorance means missing opportunities to educate or to confront negativity. Yet, despite its subtlety, ignorance can make a powerful statement. Actions often speak louder than words. By choosing bliss, we render hurtful people irrelevant. Their cruel remarks lose their sting, and we proceed with confidence. Alex may be small, but he’s not a punchline. While he may be diminutive in size, he radiates a larger-than-life presence in what truly matters. Just glance our way; we have something special to share.
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In summary, embracing ignorance can provide a protective bubble against negativity and allow us to focus on love and joy. While we may eventually confront the world’s harsh realities, we can choose how we respond—prioritizing bliss over hurt.