Let’s be honest—children can be downright disgusting. From soiled diapers and dramatic spit-ups to endless snotty noses, the messiness of parenting is no mystery. But it’s the other revolting activities that little ones engage in that truly make you question your decision to have kids in the first place. These unimaginable and unsanitary behaviors are the stuff of nightmares. For the sake of discretion, I won’t confirm whether these acts of grossness were committed by my children or others. Let’s dive into the 10 disturbing things you hope your kids will never do—but probably will.
- Explore Their Boogers in Creative Ways
Kids often think that boogers make the perfect snack. But did you know they also double as a unique wall decoration? If you can’t find glue, just use the sticky remnants from your child’s nose! - Relieve Themselves in a Public Pool
Ah, the ultimate parenting embarrassment. Even when you think your child is potty-trained, they might decide that pooping in their swimsuit is the way to go. If you’re lucky, it’s contained, but if not, get ready for a swift evacuation. - Investigate Their Own Anatomy at Dinner
What is it about private parts that fascinates kids during mealtime? One moment they’re fiddling with their junk, and the next, they’re reaching for a carrot like nothing happened. Here’s hoping this phase passes swiftly. - Snack on Old Food Found in Your Car
Imagine opening the car door to find your toddler chowing down on a stale piece of candy from last Halloween. It’s like they’re channeling their inner scavenger! - Create Disgusting Food Experiments
Call it “Culinary Curiosity.” Kids love to mix and match food items in ways that would make even a frat house cringe. Ever wondered how ketchup and apples taste together? Neither have I, but they might! - Use Anything Other Than a Napkin for Wiping
Shirts, furniture, other food—nothing is off-limits for little ones when it comes to cleaning up their mess. Who needs a napkin when you have a perfectly good shirt? - Go Days Without Changing Underwear
Why grab a clean pair when the old ones are just sitting there? It’s a mystery how kids can wear the same underwear for an entire week without anyone noticing. - Store Food in Their Cheeks
Instead of swallowing, kids might choose to keep that uneaten piece of turkey in their cheeks for an eternity. By the time they finally decide to swallow, it’s a mushy mess that could make any parent gag. - Drink From a Questionable Beverage Container
Kids are thirsty, I get it. But do they ever stop to check how long that cup of milk has been hiding in the car? Spoiled milk and amoebic dysentery are not on my list of fun experiences. - Use Non-Toilet Paper Items for Wiping
As children grow up, they gain independence, but sometimes that means wiping with whatever is available. If you run out of toilet paper, say goodbye to that nice hand towel!
In summary, parenting brings a unique set of challenges and surprises—most of which involve navigating the gross behaviors of your little ones. While you might hope they never engage in these activities, it’s almost guaranteed that they will. Just remember, these moments will make for some great stories later on!
For more insights on parenting and related topics, check out our other blog posts, like this one on intracervical insemination. If you’re looking for at-home insemination kits, visit Make A Mom for reputable options. Additionally, for a wealth of information on pregnancy and home insemination, IVF Babble is an excellent resource.
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