When I was a child, I loved to play pretend “waitress.” I’d don an apron, tote around a notepad, and take orders from my siblings and stuffed animals, happily serving them food I prepared in my imaginary kitchen. Those were the days — fulfilling everyone’s culinary needs right from the comfort of my own home!
Fast forward a couple of decades, and it turns out my childhood dream has morphed into an exhausting reality. For the last twenty years, I’ve been catering to a never-ending stream of hungry people. Honestly, I think I’ve created a well-worn path in my kitchen that runs from the fridge to the pantry to the oven and back again. The irony isn’t lost on me, especially since these same folks keep returning for more.
Could I possibly get a coffee break here? The kitchen feels like it’s perpetually open! It seems like just five minutes ago everyone was munching on their fifth snack of the day.
If your household resembles mine, the kitchen is always bustling with activity. It’s a relentless cycle of meal prep, cooking, cleaning, and then waiting for the next round of meals to be needed. I don’t recall having constant access to snacks as a kid. My mother cooked dinner, and most nights, that meant something that came from a box labeled “Helper.” Meals were quick, and we were in and out in no time, which meant we weren’t loitering around the kitchen.
What about healthy snacks made from organic produce? In my childhood, that was simply called, “Here’s a box of raisins. Be back when the streetlights come on for TV dinners!” We were self-sufficient and spent our days outside, not hanging around the kitchen waiting to be served. Today’s kids, it appears, have all the time in the world to rummage through cabinets, searching for snacks, making messes, or sampling everything in sight. Seriously, do we really need yet another open bag of chips when there are three already?
My kids have graduated past the babyproofing stage to what I affectionately call the “raccoon stage.” I go to bed with a clean kitchen, only to wake up to what looks like a wild party occurred overnight. This phase, aptly named “living with tweens and teenagers and their insatiable appetites,” means my kids are never satisfied. They are like bears emerging from hibernation, constantly on the prowl for food. I’ve resorted to hiding snacks around the house. Who even does that? I’ll tell you — the mom who spends $800 at the grocery store, only to hear two days later, “Mom, we have nothing to eat.”
I’m rationing food now. Chips? They’re tucked away in the back of my closet. Granola bars? Nope, stashed in a tampon box under the sink. Fudge ice cream bars? Look in the frozen kale box. Yep, that’s right. Now, can everyone kindly exit the kitchen?
As I endure a well-meaning older woman’s reminder that I’ll miss these days, I find myself daydreaming about a kitchen that stays spotless and empty most of the time. I envision “sandwich nights” five days a week and enjoying two evenings out without the kids.
Miss the hefty grocery bills and my accidental career as a waitress, sous chef, and dishwasher? Not even close. I might just convert my kitchen into a shoe closet after they all move out.
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In summary, while childhood dreams of being a waitress may seem charming, the reality of parenting comes with its own challenges — especially in the kitchen. Managing a household filled with hungry kids can feel overwhelming, but it’s all part of the journey.