Every time my kids visit their grandma, they come back glowing with happiness, as if they’ve just returned from a rejuvenating retreat. It’s like a weekend at Grandma’s gives them the same boost a week at a luxury spa would give me. They’re more relaxed, calmer, and utterly content. What on earth is she doing that I’m missing out on?
The other day, during a morning stroll, I had an epiphany while observing a granddad and his little granddaughter. Just a few minutes of watching them together revealed everything I needed to know. It became clear that my approach might need some adjustment. Grandparents possess a treasure trove of wisdom accumulated through years of parenting one generation and then excelling with the next. I can’t wait to join that club.
The little girl, about two years old, was walking beside her grandpa in nothing but a sagging pink princess pull-up, with bedhead hair and possibly some remnants of peanut butter and jelly on her cheeks. They were on a walk too, with her bouncing around, excitedly pointing at trees and clouds, and helping her granddad call for the dog. He looked like he’d just rolled out of bed, ambling along behind her at a leisurely pace. “Come back here!” he would shout to the dog, and she’d mimic him with her adorable slurred, “Omm ack ear!” Their giggles filled the air, completely absorbed in their own little world.
They were having the time of their lives—just the absolute best time. It struck me that they had all the time in the world to simply enjoy each other’s company, with nothing else on their minds. I couldn’t recall ever feeling that way with a toddler—so immersed in the moment, not worrying about what was next.
As I watched this joyful little girl, I reminisced about my own boys when they were toddlers. But rather than basking in those memories, I remembered all the anxious thoughts that clouded my mind: worries about being outside without shoes, concerns over their outfits, and the constant pressure to keep to a schedule. The “schedule.” It dictated our lives, filled with snack times, playdates, nap times, and endless milestones to track. I had a mental list swirling around my head at all times, while this granddad seemed blissfully free of such burdens, parenting with grace and patience. I wished I could have learned from him sooner.
If I could turn back time, I would trade all those stressful days for lazy afternoons with my kids, wandering barefoot in sagging diapers, enjoying nature, yelling at dogs, and laughing about the simple joys around us. I would toss aside my watch, my lists, and all those rigid schedules. Because, in retrospect, none of that really mattered. I thought it did, but I realize now it didn’t. I would have filled those years with joy rather than anxiety, cherishing every moment. If only I could have parented back then with the carefree spirit of a grandparent.
As I waved goodbye to the little girl and her granddad, I found myself daydreaming about the day I’ll have my own grandkids over. I can’t wait for us to enjoy lazy days together, embracing our imperfections, which, I’ve come to learn, is the true essence of perfection.
For further insights on parenting and family dynamics, check out this blog post. Also, for those interested in boosting fertility, Make a Mom offers fantastic resources. And if you’re looking for more information on pregnancy and home insemination, Kindbody is an excellent source.
Summary
The author reflects on the blissful, carefree parenting style of grandparents, contrasting it with their own anxious, schedule-driven approach. Inspired by watching a granddad and his granddaughter, they wish they could have embraced the joy of simply being present with their own children. The piece emphasizes the value of enjoying the moment rather than adhering to rigid schedules, and it looks forward to future grandparenting with a newfound perspective.