Earlier this year, on St. Patrick’s Day morning, I followed our usual routine with only the slightest changes. I assisted my son in getting dressed, intentionally pulling out a green shirt. That was it. After dropping him off at school, I returned home and went online. What did I find?
Kitchens with chairs toppled over and cabinet doors ajar. Living rooms littered with shoes and books. Homemade “traps” for catching leprechauns. Bathrooms festooned with toilet paper streamers. Honestly, it resembled a typical Wednesday in my own home, but no, this chaos was inspired by those mischievous little Irish sprites.
I suddenly realized some of my son’s classmates would be buzzing about how a leprechaun had visited their homes overnight, leaving a delightful mess behind — because that’s what these mythical beings do: they wreak havoc and leave behind chocolate coins and special editions of Lucky Charms. The betrayal I felt from my fellow parents was palpable. They had let me down once more, dragging us into a world that incessantly pushes for more magic than necessary.
I can’t fathom why some parents feel the need to ramp up the enchantment. St. Patrick’s Day is meant to be a day to don every piece of green clothing you own, perhaps indulge in corned beef and cabbage, and enjoy a pint of Guinness or two. We used to do small things to celebrate with our kids, like adding green food dye to dinner. But after realizing that turning food green could make it inedible, we decided enough was enough, while other parents seemed to dive headfirst into even greener madness.
I tolerated this nonsense for other holidays, but everyone has their breaking point. One of these days, my son will come home and ask why a leprechaun visits his friend Johnny’s house each year but not ours. “Leprechauns aren’t real, and Johnny’s parents are flat-out lying. Now eat your green eggs.” This is a charade I refuse to join in on, along with all the other ways parents are trying to inject extra magic into already magical occasions.
Situation: Christmas
We have a jolly man in a red suit who comes down our chimney, visiting every home in the world on a flying sleigh pulled by reindeer. He leaves presents under the tree, handpicking them just for you.
Verdict: NOT ENOUGH MAGIC. Let’s introduce an Elf on the Shelf who watches our kids for a month, and we must remember to move him each night to keep the illusion alive. Oh, and let’s sprinkle powdered sugar to mimic Santa’s footprints from the fireplace to the tree—never mind that he left gifts and devoured our cookies, and that there’s no snow outside.
Situation: Losing a Tooth
You place it under your pillow and wake up to find a few coins or some cash left by a fairy.
Verdict: NEEDS MORE MAGIC. Let’s scatter glitter as fairy dust, which will inevitably take months to vacuum out of the carpet. And how about a note from the Tooth Fairy emphasizing the importance of dental hygiene? Instead of just a dollar, let’s leave a whole toy, so your child feels $27 worth of love instead of just $1.
Situation: Easter
A bunny hides eggs around your house while you sleep. No one knows why. Inside the eggs? Candy. Toss them in a basket with fake grass. Then, subject your kids to sitting on the bunny’s lap at the mall beforehand—pure terror.
Verdict: NO MAGIC HERE. Let’s make all the food look like tiny bunny faces or rears. Instead of hiding eggs, fill a field with plastic ones so kids can just trample each other in a mad dash to gather more eggs than anyone else. Don’t forget to fill the Easter basket with gifts and treat it like a spring version of Christmas.
Thanksgiving has mostly remained untouched, but it’s only a matter of time before Pinterest inundates me with images of stuffed pilgrims watching over the kids, ready to unleash smallpox if they misbehave in November.
Life is already filled with magic. Look around! You’re alive, and there are endless ways to feel that magic if you take a moment to breathe and appreciate what you have. Instead of teaching our kids to expect constant wonder, let’s guide them to appreciate the world around them. It’s already pretty amazing, even without the glitter and chocolate.
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In summary, let’s embrace the genuine magic of life and stop overcomplicating things with unnecessary embellishments.