Hey there, parents! Are you fed up with getting too much sleep? Longing for some quality bonding time with your little one at 3 AM? Tired of their obsession with Thomas the Tank Engine? Well, look no further—Stephen King, the king of horror himself, has the perfect solution: his new children’s book, Charlie the Choo Choo.
Written under the alias Beryl Evans, this tale revolves around Charlie, a “gruff” little train (read: psychopathic) with a sinister grin and lifeless eyes, who is inseparable from his conductor, Engineer Bob. When Bob’s boss, Mr. Briggs, tells him that Charlie is being retired to make way for a shiny new diesel locomotive, the story takes a dark turn. Picture Charlie rusting in the train yard, pondering his wasted life and looming demise. Just the thing to say as you tuck your kids in: “Remember, darling, we all end up old and abandoned one day. Sweet dreams!”
Amazon claims this book is suitable for ages 4-8 and grades preschool-3rd, but we might want to raise an eyebrow over that classification.
This book was part of a promotional push for the upcoming movie Dark Tower, which is based on King’s acclaimed series. The film, featuring Idris Elba, is set to hit theaters in February. But let’s get back to the book!
In the third installment of the Dark Tower series, The Waste Lands, a boy named Jake spots Charlie the Choo Choo on display in a bookstore. That’s when the creepiness begins: “As he gazed at the cover, Jake felt unease wash over him. You seem happy, but I suspect that’s just a mask,” he thinks. Yikes! Nothing like a good scare to wake you up!
To recap, King has crafted a genuine children’s book based on a fictional one from his story, where the child reading it thinks that the train might have sinister plans. While it’s not explicitly a horror story, just glancing at that train’s face might make any parent think twice about letting him babysit. Described as a tale of “friendship, loyalty, and hard work,” it also features a train whose favorite song is:
“Don’t ask me silly questions, I won’t play silly games,
I’m just a simple choo-choo train, and I’ll always be the same,
I only want to race along, beneath a bright blue sky,
and be a happy choo-choo train, until the day I die.”Yikes again! But it gets even darker with the altered last lines Charlie sings after being left alone:
“Now that I can’t race along, beneath a bright blue sky,
I guess that I’ll just sit right here, until I finally die.”Oh my goodness, Charlie! There are kids around!
Charlie the Choo Choo is likely best suited for fearless kids and adults who are fans of the Dark Tower series. While we adore Stephen King, we can’t say we’re ready to have that cover on our shelves. Between Charlie’s menacing grin—definitely the face of a train that could take out Thomas—and the kids in the caboose who might be shrieking in joy or absolute terror, we might not be strong enough for this one. Nevertheless, it seems like a fun collector’s item for those eagerly awaiting Idris Elba’s Dark Tower…sorry, just Dark Tower (Starring Idris Elba).
In case you’re curious about more insightful topics about family planning and pregnancy, check out this resource for a wealth of information. Additionally, if you want to delve into home insemination kits, this page could be a valuable read. And don’t forget to peruse our terms and conditions for more on what we offer.
Summary
Stephen King’s new children’s book, Charlie the Choo Choo, is a darkly humorous tale about a creepy train and his conductor. While marketed for young kids, the book’s eerie themes might be better suited for those who aren’t easily scared. It serves as a quirky collector’s item for fans of the Dark Tower series.