In today’s world, it’s crucial to consider whether girls should be raised differently than boys. As a mom of four, I firmly believe the answer is yes. While it’s not ideal and perhaps not something we wish to do, preparing my daughter for the intricacies of life in 2023 requires a different strategy than that for my sons.
I have three boys and one girl, and my goal is to nurture them all into strong, thoughtful individuals who stand up for what is right, embrace kindness, and remember to savor life’s moments. However, the reality is that I need to approach my daughter’s upbringing with a slightly altered perspective.
Despite the progress we’ve made, stereotypes still exist, and influences from media and society can impact my children in unexpected ways. There are people around us who encourage my sons to be tough and expect my daughter to be soft. While there’s nothing wrong with occasionally embracing traditional roles—like wearing a pink dress or allowing boys to play rough—this shouldn’t be the entire narrative.
For my daughter, I want her to embody strength and resilience. She proudly sports Star Wars shirts and her brothers’ old race car boxer briefs, but she also loves wearing dresses when she feels like it. I encourage her to express her feelings loudly when she needs to, and I teach her that it’s perfectly okay to be assertive and competitive, even against her brothers. At the same time, I instill in my sons the importance of respecting her voice, even if that means being outshouted by her during a game.
This may seem straightforward, but it’s not as simple as it sounds. The world remains tough on girls, and while I engage in discussions about women’s strength in the workplace, I recognize that there are still barriers to navigate. Therefore, I also teach my daughter how to communicate effectively, sometimes softening her message if it helps her be heard. Unfortunately, some may dismiss her opinions more readily than they would her brothers’, so I arm her with the tools to express herself in different ways.
While I want my sons to be direct and forthright, I also know that my daughter may need to temper her assertiveness to be taken seriously. It’s a delicate balance: I want her to be confident and outspoken, but I also need to prepare her for a world that may not always welcome that assertiveness.
Additionally, I have to teach my daughter to be aware of her personal space and safety in ways my sons might not fully comprehend. Yes, they face risks too, and I’ll educate them about that, but the realities for my daughter are distinct. It’s a sad truth that girls often face threats that boys do not, and I want her to be equipped to handle those situations.
As much as I’d love to raise all my children the same way, I recognize that the world is not yet ready for that. This means addressing social norms in different ways for each child. It might mean ensuring my daughter isn’t always cast as the damsel in distress or letting my sons know it’s okay to lean on others, including women, for support.
Ultimately, I’m just trying to do my best in a complex world that presents unique challenges to each of my children. If you’re interested in exploring more about pregnancy and home insemination, check out this excellent resource on pregnancy, and for a deeper dive into the topic, you can visit our detailed posts on insemination kits available here and here.
Summary
Raising children today requires an understanding of the different societal expectations for boys and girls. While I aim to instill strength and kindness in all my children, I recognize the need for tailored approaches. My daughter must learn to navigate a world that often challenges her assertiveness, all while my sons need to be taught to respect and listen to her voice. Balancing these lessons ensures that all my children are prepared for the future.