By: Cervical Insemination
Updated: Aug. 22, 2015
Originally Published: Nov. 16, 2012
I’m not alone in this—every mom has received at least one less-than-flattering portrait from her little artist. Honestly, it’s a miracle we maintain even a sliver of self-esteem after what these kids put us through. “I drove my mommy straight to the insane asylum! What have you accomplished today?”
Breastfeeding often makes us feel like cattle, and apparently, we resemble them too. “Psst… your breasts are hanging out of your shirt and they’re a bit lopsided.”
And no, mom didn’t just finish a romantic encounter; she’s merely battling the toilet. “Phew! If I looked like that, I’d be crying too!”
So what if these kids give me zits? I’m enjoying my muffins, thank you very much! “Is it a transvestite? A cat? No, it’s MOM!”
Of course, I’m angry—dad is snoozing away in the corner. “Caleb, you’re a wise young man. Can you help mom with the wine?”
“Hey, mom, no offense, but it might be time for a bikini wax.” “Shut it, kiddo. You’re the reason I drink in the first place!”
“It’s not a tumor! You don’t need to look so terrified!”
If you’re chuckling at these relatable moments, you’re not alone. For more amusing insights into parenting, you can check out one of our other blog posts here. And if you’re considering at-home insemination, this reputable online retailer offers excellent kits to help you on your journey. For further information about pregnancy and home insemination, visit this excellent resource.
In summary, motherhood is a whirlwind of emotions, laughter, and a fair share of embarrassing moments. With the right support and tools, we can navigate this chaotic yet beautiful journey together.
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