I affectionately call myself an affirmation enthusiast. There’s nothing quite like the rush of hearing someone acknowledge that I’m doing a good job. Whether it’s a grand statement like, “Your dedication is inspiring,” or a simple, “Wow, your house looks tidy!”—I thrive on those little bursts of recognition. I collect compliments like they’re rare Pokémon cards; they make me feel valued.
One area where I crave validation the most is in my role as a mom. Who doesn’t want to hear that they’re rocking the parenting gig? And let’s be honest, it feels fantastic when someone, whether a friend or a stranger, stops to say, “You’re doing amazing.” Those words can lift you to cloud nine, reminding you that you’re making a difference. Especially on those tough days, a little praise can feel like a much-needed lifeline.
Of course, there’s nothing wrong with enjoying compliments. We all deserve a kind word now and then. The issue I face (and perhaps you do too) is that I often find myself overly reliant on external validation rather than recognizing my own achievements. I get caught in a cycle of seeking acknowledgment from others instead of celebrating my own successes.
Picture this: I spend an entire day with my kids and a friend. They behave impeccably—polite, patient, and even use tissues instead of my shirt when they have a runny nose. They’re practically little angels! Yet, I’m sitting there, eagerly waiting for my friend to say, “Your kids are so well-behaved!” I’m so focused on securing her praise that I forget to appreciate how proud I am of their behavior. Instead of taking a moment to acknowledge, “Wow, I’m doing great at this parenting thing,” I just keep waiting for someone else to notice. Talk about a waste of time!
I get it; sometimes you really do need that little boost from someone else. But guess what? Sometimes that person needs to be you. Take a step back and reflect on your accomplishments, and give yourself that well-deserved pat on the back. Relish in the results of your hard work.
Parenting is undeniably challenging, and it’s all too easy to focus on what we perceive as failures. Let’s shift that mindset! When was the last time you congratulated yourself for handling a toddler tantrum like a pro? Or for keeping your cool when your teenager tested your patience? When did you last look in the mirror and remind yourself, “I’m an incredible parent, and my kids are lucky to have me”?
We all aspire to raise thoughtful, confident children. We want them to believe in themselves, which is why we shower them with encouragement. But we also need to believe in ourselves as parents. We must model that confidence so they can learn it from us.
So, stop waiting for that glowing review from the babysitter, your in-laws, or your partner. Give yourself the credit you deserve. Repeat after me: I’m a fantastic mom, and I’m doing an amazing job raising these kids. Need more parenting insights? Check out this post on home insemination for more great tips!
To sum it up, stop relying solely on outside validation and start recognizing your own strengths as a parent. Celebrate your victories, no matter how small.