I can’t quite pinpoint when it all started. Perhaps it’s the typical plight of being the third child, often dragged along to older siblings’ events with nothing to occupy my time. Maybe it’s the countless dinners at restaurants where good behavior is the only option during lengthy waits. Or, it could simply be that my younger son, Jacob, feels the sting of being left out while his sister enjoys her iPod and his brother is glued to the computer. Add in the fact that I can’t resist those big puppy dog eyes staring at me, and we have a recipe for disaster.
Whatever the reason, things have spiraled out of control: Jacob believes my smartphone is his personal plaything. And let me tell you, it isn’t.
It’s not just that I’ve always been a bit possessive of my gadgets; his obsession with my phone is starting to create a rift in our relationship—my relationship with him and my precious device. There was that one time he turned my phone into a makeshift float for his action figures, which ended up costing me $200 to replace. Then there was the incident where he accidentally deleted a bunch of important emails from my inbox—emails I never retrieved and which left me looking like a jerk for not responding. Oh, and let’s not forget the epic meltdown he had when I dared to use it to text a friend during a hurricane. My phone is now filled with more kids’ apps than anything remotely useful; this ends now!
I’m not entirely sure how I’m going to reclaim my phone, and I know it won’t be easy. I could go cold turkey and brace myself for the inevitable tantrums, or I could gradually wean him off his tech obsession. Maybe I could try to reason with him about why I need my phone back, or I could just blame it on some imaginary rule (“The phone people made a new rule. They are for grown-ups only now!”). Alternatively, I could simply delete all the apps and act clueless. Perhaps a mix of all these strategies will do the trick.
Times are changing, Jacob. I love you dearly, but the phone is mine, and I’m done sharing. Just don’t give me that look.
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Summary
In this humorous reflection, a mother grapples with her child’s overzealous attachment to her smartphone. From costly accidents to emotional outbursts, she realizes it’s time to take back her device and establish boundaries.
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