I found myself sitting in my 7-year-old daughter’s room, trying to assist her with her homework. And when I say “trying,” I mean it was more of a struggle than a success. Whenever she encounters something difficult, a hint of confusion arises, and suddenly, it’s game over. The moment math problems or tricky words appear, she transforms into a mini tornado of frustration.
We were tackling basic math concepts like number lines and rounding to the nearest ten. But twice, she clenched her fists and pounded the paper before storming to the corner, burying her head in her knees. “You’re making it harder!” she exclaimed whenever I attempted to explain, or she’d wail, “I just can’t do it!” It’s a whirlwind of emotions, and it all comes down to the fact that she’s an anxious learner.
She’s always been this way. Homework triggers her anxiety, and I can’t quite pinpoint why. Her older brother, on the other hand, has his own set of challenges—more related to laziness than anxiety. He procrastinates and takes shortcuts, but he doesn’t lash out like she does. He never retreats into silence or expresses his irritation with a dramatic flair.
Such is the reality of parenting. Despite sharing genes and resembling one another, my children are as different as night and day, each presenting unique hurdles to overcome. Right now, my daughter’s schooling is at the forefront of our challenges.
As we worked on a problem involving dimes and pennies, I coaxed her out of her corner for another attempt. We even used some candy coins from the pantry to make it more engaging. Sweet treats definitely help lighten the mood!
The biggest hurdle for me is staying patient through her frustrations. Each time she struggles with what seems like simple math, I feel the urge to scream. I want her to persevere and let me help her. However, for her, asking for help feels like admitting defeat. She believes she should be able to manage on her own, and sometimes, that’s just not realistic.
When working with an anxious student, it’s crucial to reassure them that seeking help is perfectly fine. You have to express your willingness to support them, even on days when you’re running on empty and just want to scream to fast-forward to dinner and bedtime.
I’ve learned that losing my cool only exacerbates the situation, adding to her anxiety and leading to more tears and resistance. It’s a cycle that can be tough to break.
While there’s a lot of debate about the impact of homework on young children, I’m grateful my daughter has it. I want her to face these challenges at home, where I can help her develop the coping strategies she’ll need in school. As frustrating as it can be, I believe my involvement is invaluable.
I strive to keep the atmosphere positive and engaging. I cheer her on, making sure she knows I’m right there beside her through every challenge. As her dad, it’s my job to show love and support, even when she’s frustrated or resistant.
After an hour of battling through the worksheet, we finally finished. It felt like we’d conquered Mount Everest. She let out a huge sigh of relief, like she’d just crossed the finish line of a marathon. Then, she wrapped her arms around me and called me a great dad.
It’s moments like these that make the struggle worthwhile. Parenting can sometimes feel thankless, but that simple hug reminds me that I’m on the right track.
In the end, working with an anxious student requires patience, understanding, and a whole lot of love.
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Summary: Parenting an anxious child can be a daunting task, especially when it comes to homework. Understanding their unique challenges and providing unwavering support is essential. By maintaining a positive attitude and encouraging them to ask for help, you can help your anxious student navigate their educational journey.