Once upon a time, I was swimming in friendships. I had endless hours to spend debating whether Kelly Taylor should have ended up with Dylan or Brandon. A group of us would polish off a box of Franzia while watching Dirty Dancing, singing, dancing, and dishing out the latest gossip. Back then, I had best friends, almost best friends, close friends, friends of friends, and a whole lot more. But fast forward to today? Let’s just say my social circle has shrunk considerably.
Over the past decade, my friendships have undergone a significant contraction. As I welcomed a husband, in-laws, and eventually kids into my life, many friendships inevitably fell by the wayside. We no longer have endless time to spare. Our interests, values, and priorities have evolved. Some friends have moved across the country or even across the globe. This shift has led me to redefine what friendship means to me. Nowadays, it’s all about quality over quantity.
Sure, there are moments when I wish I had a bustling social life again. I sometimes yearn to be part of the “in” crowd and feel that pang of envy when I see photos on Facebook of friends having a blast without me. But I’ve come to realize that popularity, likes, and invitations don’t equate to genuine friendship. I’m quite content knowing that while my list of close friends may not be overflowing, the ones who are on it are truly exceptional.
A Life-Altering Experience
This new perspective on friendship isn’t just a result of growing older and having less time; it’s also shaped by the life-altering experiences we share. A few years back, one of my closest friends, Sarah, was diagnosed with breast cancer. Throughout our long friendship, we had faced many challenges, but nothing quite as devastating as this.
Determined to be the best friend I could be, I made it my mission to support her. I texted her every day, sometimes multiple times a day, offering my unwavering support. When she needed to vent about her failed surgeries and infections, I was there, firing off texts filled with exasperation and swearing. When she needed someone to accompany her during her first week of chemotherapy, I hopped on a plane, crossing half the country to be by her side. It was a big deal for me—I hadn’t flown alone in over a decade.
Walking into her house, I was nervous. I wondered how this new reality would affect our friendship. Could I be the friend she needed, or would I crumble under the emotional weight? But as soon as I arrived, she asked, “Wanna see?” and I realized that beneath the circumstances, we were still the same friends we had always been. “Absolutely,” I replied, and we snuck off to her bedroom, where I saw her post-mastectomy scars.
The next day we made our way to the hospital together, pretending we were off to get pedicures instead of facing chemotherapy. We filled our time with laughter and ridiculous social media posts while I held a bucket for her when the nausea kicked in. I helped with laundry, bathed her son, and even went grocery shopping, picking up organic fruit and wholesome treats, all while pretending she was on a fancy detox instead of enduring harsh treatments.
When I saw her months later, she was in the process of getting breast implants. We snuck into the restaurant restroom to discuss sizes and shapes before returning to our table, laughing over fries and gossiping like two carefree women.
Embracing Imperfection
As much as I wanted to be the perfect friend, I often fell short. I worried about my own trivial problems and felt the weight of distance between us. But I learned that perfection in friendship doesn’t exist. What truly matters is finding beautifully imperfect people who step into the muck of life alongside you. While life may not be overflowing with friendships anymore, the few I do have are stronger and more meaningful.
We may not have a plethora of friends, but the few we keep close are worth their weight in gold. Together, they create a unique blend of support that embodies the essence of true friendship.
If you’re curious about more insights into personal relationships, check out our other blog posts on home insemination kit topics, such as this one. For additional information on enhancing fertility, you might want to explore this resource. Also, for statistics on pregnancy and infertility, this resource is incredibly helpful.
To sum up, while my circle of friends may have shrunk, the bonds I have forged now are stronger, richer, and more fulfilling than ever. It’s all about quality over quantity, and I wouldn’t trade my close-knit group for anything.