With a bustling household, I’ve realized that Baby No. 4 is the game changer. At this point, society no longer considers your family “just” large; you have to apply for a special “massive family” license. But let’s not get sidetracked by that.
When you reach Baby No. 4, something shifts within you. You become a parenting pro, and your approach changes dramatically. Here are some amusing ways that my parenting style evolved from my first baby to my fourth (and fifth and sixth).
First Baby vs. Fourth Baby
First baby: Are they really allowing us to leave the hospital with this little bundle?
Fourth baby: Who even watches the discharge video anymore? It’s like a mini-movie marathon!
First baby: We had the baby’s name picked out and the crib bedding monogrammed by the second trimester.
Fourth baby: The nurse has asked for the birth certificate form like four times! We need to come up with something quick!
First baby: I spent weeks researching the best educational toys for newborns and created a top 10 list for our registry.
Fourth baby: You know what newborns find stimulating? Staying awake!
First baby: Oh, I adore getting personalized items for the baby!
Fourth baby: It’s fine if his bibs say “Little Miss Sunshine,” right? These towels have his brother’s name on them; no biggie!
First baby: Why didn’t anyone warn me that breastfeeding would be this challenging?!
Fourth baby: (nursing while supervising two older siblings and taking a phone call)
First baby: We had the baby last Friday! Did you get our photo birth announcements yet?
Fourth baby: Honey, that was two months ago. Can you just throw something up on Facebook?
First baby: The baby will be crawling soon! We must secure the furniture, install baby gates, and cover all the outlets.
Fourth baby: Well, at least the stairs are carpeted.
First baby: Oh no, that pacifier dropped on the floor. It’s contaminated now!
Fourth baby: (glance around, wait five minutes, then pop it back in the baby’s mouth)
First baby: Bath time is such a cherished part of our bedtime routine!
Fourth baby: If I clean the baby’s spit-up off her chin during the next diaper change, she should be fine for a couple more days.
First baby: That’s smack dab in the middle of naptime. We’ll need to reschedule!
Fourth baby: Whenever works — she can nap in the car.
First baby: Is everything packed in the diaper bag? Diapers, wipes, rash cream, changing pad, receiving blankets, burp cloths, two extra outfits, a hat, nasal aspirator, gas drops, pacifiers, snacks, teething rings, toys, hand sanitizer, nursing cover…
Fourth baby: Boobs? Check. Diaper? Let me toss one in my bag real quick and we’ll be on our way.
First baby: After months of coaxing, she’s finally mobile! Lucky for you, there’s a YouTube video and 600 photos on my blog.
Fourth baby: Does anyone need some pants in size 6 months? We’re switching to dresses to curb early crawling.
First baby: “…and they all lived happily ever after. The End.” Want to read it again?
Fourth baby: “Once upon a ti—” Hey, you kids, stop yelling up there! “Once up—” I said don’t jump on that! You’re going to break it! “Once upon a—” That’s it! I’m coming up there, and everyone is getting a time out!
See what I mean? Maybe you become more laid-back after the fourth, or perhaps your free time and mental energy have dwindled. Likely, it’s a bit of both. To learn more about parenting and family life, check out this excellent resource for pregnancy and home insemination from MedlinePlus. Also, for those looking to boost fertility, check out these fertility boosters for men.
In summary, the transition from parenting your first baby to your fourth is filled with humorous adjustments and a more relaxed attitude. With experience comes an understanding that sometimes, less is more!