Parenting is a hot topic, and for good reason. Just take a look at any article about parenting mishaps or read through the comments on various platforms, and you’ll find a plethora of judgments being handed out like candy. It’s frustrating, but it happens.
What’s even more perplexing is when parents feel judged when there’s no judgment to be found. I’ve witnessed countless scenarios where someone feels attacked simply because another parent has a different approach. For instance, one mom might proudly share that she avoids processed foods for her kids, and another might interpret that as a dig against those who don’t. Or when a parent expresses their love for co-sleeping, others might jump in with alternative bonding ideas as if they’re being called out.
I’ve experienced this myself in a few areas of parenting. When I mention that my kids are homeschooled, some people immediately begin to defend their choice of public schooling, as if my decision is a critique of theirs. I assure you, our choice to educate our children at home is not a judgment of your decision to send yours to a public school. Each family’s situation is unique, and there are myriad ways to achieve a good education.
Similarly, I’ve encountered defensiveness when I reveal that I breastfed each of my kids well beyond the average. I’m not here to preach about weaning; I understand that every mother has her reasons for how long she chooses to breastfeed or whether she even does at all. My choices reflect what works for my family, not a commentary on yours.
It’s essential to recognize that my parenting decisions are not statements about yours. It’s entirely possible for two different choices to both be valid and beneficial. As long as your methods are safe for your children, I don’t care what you do; I trust you know what’s best for your family.
That said, I’ve seen instances where parents unintentionally come across as judgmental when sharing their choices. Sometimes, what’s meant to be a simple sharing of experiences can sound preachy. We need to be mindful of how we express our parenting philosophies and ensure we’re not casting shade on others.
Let’s strive to give each other the benefit of the doubt. Just because someone chooses differently doesn’t mean they are judging you. There are countless ways to raise well-adjusted, healthy kids, and we should celebrate the diversity in parenting styles instead of feeling defensive. The truth is, most parents are simply doing the best they can with what they have.
In the end, we’re all navigating this wild parenting journey together. I have my paddle, you have yours—let’s encourage each other and keep moving forward, each in our own unique way. If you’re interested in more about parenting choices, check out this other blog post.
Summary: Parenting choices shouldn’t lead to unnecessary judgments. Each family has unique circumstances that guide their decisions, and it’s important to respect and celebrate the diversity in parenting styles. Instead of feeling defensive, let’s support one another in our journeys.