Great news for moms of daughters! It turns out that our persistent reminders and advice might actually work in our favor. A study conducted by the University of Essex reveals that girls with “nagging” mothers—let’s be honest, we prefer the term “dedicated”—are more likely to attend college, secure higher-paying jobs, and steer clear of teen pregnancy compared to those with more laid-back moms.
Lead researcher, Clara Jenkins, tracked over 15,000 girls aged 13 and 14 from 2004 to 2010. The findings highlighted that high parental expectations significantly influenced the girls’ choices in life. As the primary parent, mothers typically have the most impact, and guess what? We’re the ones getting credit for that! Cheers to us!
As someone who was raised by a mother with lofty expectations who wasn’t shy about sharing them, I can confidently say that this approach works. I’m sure that part of the reason I didn’t flunk out of high school was the thought of my mom saying, “See, I told you to study.” I’d rather face a dragon than give her that satisfaction. And who graduated? This gal right here! Thanks, Mom!
Interestingly, the study shows that even when teens act like they’re tuning us out, our words still resonate. Jenkins noted, “In many cases, we succeeded in doing what we believed was more convenient for us, even when this was against our parents’ will. But no matter how hard we tried to avoid our parents’ recommendations, it is likely that they ended up influencing…choices.” That’s right—moms, we’re in their heads! It’s like we’ve set up shop in their minds, advising them on even their most personal decisions.
Furthermore, Jenkins found that “What our parents expected about our school choices was, very likely, a major determinant of our decisions about conceiving a child or not during our teenage years.” While having a healthy sense of self-worth is important, avoiding pregnancy just to dodge our lectures is a win in our book.
Now, what about those chill moms who never seem to get on their daughters’ cases? Are the offspring of these “Whatever Moms” doomed to a life of poor choices? Not quite. The research suggests that “parents with high expectations can reduce a teenager’s chance of becoming pregnant by four percent compared to parents with ‘average aspirations.’” Four percent might not seem like much, but hey, it’s better than nothing, right? And let’s be real—“average aspirations” is a bit of a burn, Science.
As for me, I’m going to keep on nagging my daughter with newfound confidence. Expect plenty of, “Good morning! Brush your teeth and remember—no teenage pregnancies!” or “Good night! Don’t forget to set your alarm and steer clear of drugs.” And each time my daughter rolls her eyes and says, “I know, Mom,” I’ll find comfort in knowing my influence is growing!
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In summary, research shows that moms who maintain high expectations may help their daughters achieve greater success in life. While the term “nagging” may have a negative connotation, it appears that our persistent guidance is influential, even when our teens seem uninterested. So, let’s keep up the good work!