By: Mia Thompson
Updated: Sep. 5, 2023
The highlight of my day? Choosing to ignore my toddler.
Yes, it’s true that at just two years old, he still needs help with meals, getting dressed, and even using the bathroom. I’m his primary caregiver, yet today, I opted for a brief moment of neglect—don’t judge me just yet!
Before you label me as a neglectful parent or an uninvolved mom, let me clarify: my son is still very young, and I only tuned him out from a short distance away.
Today, like many others, my little one was attached to me like a shadow. While it feels fantastic to be so needed, it can also become overwhelming. After countless requests for my attention, I found myself dreaming of a quiet moment to recharge, preferably away from the Lego blocks.
Frustration began bubbling up. I could hear it creeping into my voice and feel it in my sighs. My usual responses—“In a moment,” “You have plenty of toys,” “Let me finish this,” “I’ll play with you soon,” “Just be patient”—were met with more insistence from him. Guilt washed over me. Was I a terrible mom? Did he think I didn’t want to spend time with him? Was he interpreting my silence as “Mommy doesn’t love you”?
You’d think that by now, as a mom of three, I’d have it all figured out. Yet, my youngest challenges my parenting skills like never before. I genuinely want my kids to feel cherished and happy. However, I’ve come to understand that making them happy isn’t solely my responsibility. Happiness is an inside job, and recognizing this can lead to a more joyful life for us all.
So today, I paused to really consider what my toddler was asking. While he tugged on my hand, pleading, “Mommy, play with me,” I realized he wasn’t merely craving my presence; he was seeking entertainment. As a third child, he’s used to going along with what his older siblings initiate, and with them at school, he looks to me for that same energy.
After spending some quality time playing his favorite games, I made the conscious choice to step back. When he asked me to join in, I calmly reminded him I had tasks to finish and suggested he either help me or find something fun to do on his own.
And then, something magical happened. After just five minutes of peace, I noticed my toddler completely engrossed in a game of make-believe. It wasn’t just that he was using his imagination; the serene expression on his face—genuine joy radiating from his eyes—was a beautiful sight. He had found happiness all by himself.
Maybe I’m not such a bad mom after all.
For more insights on the journey of parenthood, check out this article from our other blog Home Insemination Kit. If you’re curious about artificial insemination, Make a Mom offers excellent resources. And for a deeper understanding of the IVF process, Parents provides a fantastic overview.
In summary, taking a step back from my toddler today allowed him to discover his own happiness, and in turn, it reminded me that sometimes, less is more when it comes to parenting.