As the school year kicks off, I recently strutted down the aisles of Target, picking up back-to-school essentials for my little ones. Mechanical pencils? Check! Washable markers? Absolutely! Classic Elmer’s glue? Even though we never use it, why not toss it in the cart? Don’t get me wrong—summer with the kids is a blast, but by August, I’m ready to reclaim that space in my brain that’s been hijacked by their relentless demand for attention.
That is, until the dreaded sick day arrives.
Let’s be honest: my kids’ elementary school (and every other one across the globe) could easily be rebranded as “Germ Central Academy.” Sure, teachers assure us that the kids wash their hands, use sanitizer, and cover their coughs—but we know better. Kids are little germ factories. And whether I like it or not, the laws of childhood dictate that snot from one kid’s nose will inevitably end up in my kid’s mouth—there’s nothing I can do to prevent that.
To brace myself for the inevitable call from the school nurse, I’ve compiled a list of the top three germs my kiddos are bound to catch from their classmates this year. And don’t worry, there are no hard feelings—we’ll gladly share the germs back when we’re done with them.
1. The “Loose Stool” Starter Pack
It all begins with a watery poop. You know the kind—sounds like pee but smells way worse? It quickly escalates into a cycle of gastrointestinal chaos that transforms your home into a not-so-fun version of Groundhog Day: Vomiting. Diarrhea. A sip of Gatorade. Simultaneous vomit and diarrhea. Dry heaves. Repeat. Thankfully, Mom usually escapes unscathed—though she might gag a little while cleaning up the mess.
2. The Lingering Cough
This nearly symptom-free annoyance is like kryptonite for perfect attendance. My kid had a slight cold weeks ago, but now some pesky post-nasal drip has him hacking for what feels like an eternity. He’s bouncing off the walls and looks perfectly fine, but I know I can’t send him to school without raising eyebrows when he’s coughing all over your kid’s backpack.
3. The Eye of Pink
Think your family is too clean to catch pink eye? Oh, darling, that’s cute. Pink eye doesn’t discriminate. It lurks in that little bit of “sleep” in the corner of your kid’s eye that you wipe away with your bare finger. It’s lurking on the classroom desk you casually touched before adjusting your contact lens. It’s even on the pillowcase you rested your head on while comforting your little one.
It’s always there, just waiting to strike.
But don’t despair, mamas! While sick days will turn your world upside down and make your laundry pile look like Everest, they also bring a silver lining. These days are our moment to shine. We are the ultimate providers of comfort and care. From extra snuggles to bingeing on episodes of Martha Speaks, no one nurses a little one back to health quite like their mama.
And you’ve got that down to a science!
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In summary, sick days are an unavoidable part of the school year, but they also offer us a unique opportunity to be there for our kids, proving that when it comes to care and comfort, no one does it better than Mom.