Hey there!
Guess what? It’s you, 16 years down the line! That little bundle of joy you’re currently cradling and protecting? Well, he’s driving now! And here’s a fun fact: he’s actually a much better driver than you ever were! I know these concepts might be a bit overwhelming right now, but I thought you might appreciate a glimpse into the future during these chaotic, sleep-deprived days.
Let’s rewind a bit before he turns 16.
Dear younger, inexperienced first-time mom,
Prepare yourself for a whirlwind of changes. Some things will shift dramatically, while others remain constant.
Since you’re feeling frazzled and a bit down, let’s begin with the changes on the horizon:
- That C-section you’re worried about? You’re going to recover surprisingly well and quickly. In fact, you’ll be grateful for the C-section after the exhausting labor. So stop feeling guilty for not delivering vaginally. Remember that professor who claimed childbirth was all about “mind over matter”? She clearly didn’t have back labor or a nearly nine-pound baby arriving a week early. Everyone’s journey is unique. In the past, you might have faced serious risks during childbirth, but modern medicine has your back. The method of delivery doesn’t define your worth; it’s all about the healthy arrival of your little one.
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On your first night in the hospital, those amazing nurses will offer to take your baby to the nursery so you can catch some sleep. Take them up on it. I know it’s hard to let go, but you can’t pour from an empty cup. You’ll resist their help and stay up all night admiring your newborn, but trust me, you’ll be begging for sleep by morning. Once you finally surrender to rest, you’ll discover that the baby wakes up just as you’re about to drift off.
Here’s a twist: one day, that baby will be a teenager who loves to sleep in. And guess what? The moment he starts sleeping until noon is the moment your internal alarm clock will permanently shift to 6 a.m. daily, and you’ll actually enjoy those early mornings with a cup of coffee. - Breastfeeding? It’ll be tougher than you imagine. You thought it would come naturally, but it requires a lot of effort and creativity. Don’t be alarmed if you end up in your bedroom, using two pillows and the boppy, trying to figure it all out. You’ll need both arms for feeding, and the process will often feel overwhelming. Yet, despite the struggle, it’s all worth it. Invest in a medical-grade breast pump to ease your workload, and let Matt help whenever he can. You’ll miss breastfeeding when it’s time to switch to formula, so cherish those moments while you can.
- But here’s the kicker: sleep deprivation is the real challenge. It’ll mess with your mind, leaving you exhausted, irritable, and forgetful. Just remember, this phase is temporary.
- As for that detailed instruction manual you’re crafting for your mother-in-law about why your baby cries? Don’t bother. You may think no one can soothe your baby like you can, but let others help. Your mother-in-law has raised kids before, and there’s no harm in letting her hold the baby. It’s essential for a healthy relationship with your child to allow others to step in.
- When your baby is around 15 months and isn’t talking, don’t panic. You’ll rush him to the pediatrician and worry like crazy. But soon, you’ll hear him confidently express his thoughts. Remember, he’ll talk when he’s ready. You’ll add more children to your family, and your heart will expand to accommodate the love for each one of them.
Yet, some things will never change. For instance, not everyone will care about your child as much as you do. While you’ll want to share every cute moment, others might not be as invested.
You’ll always feel the Mama Bear instinct to protect him, and no matter how tall he gets, he’ll always be your baby.
I’m learning new lessons every day, and there’s so much more to share, but for now, just know you’re going to get through this. To dive deeper into related topics, check out this post about home insemination. And for great resources, head over to make a mom, who are experts in this area, and this article for insight on the IVF process.
In summary, your journey as a first-time mom is filled with unpredictable moments, but every challenge is temporary. You’ll learn and grow, and your heart will expand to embrace the love for your children. Enjoy every moment, even the messy ones!