Let’s get one thing straight: I can’t stand cooking. People often tell me, “Just give it a shot; you’ll start to enjoy it.” Spoiler alert: I don’t. If we were all culinary geniuses like Gordon Ramsay, we’d live in a world filled with fancy restaurants serving dishes I can’t even pronounce, and I’d have a valid excuse to scream at anyone who dared to make a mistake in the kitchen. Sadly, not everyone is blessed with a passion for food that goes beyond simply consuming it. I’ve always been somewhat challenged in the culinary department—my greatest achievement is managing to turn on the oven without burning my house down. Here’s why cooking has become even more torturous since having kids:
- It’s a Daily Demand.
Every single night, someone expects a meal. Seriously, where’s the variety? If we visited the zoo every day, it would quickly lose its charm. Why not adopt a meal plan where dinner happens every other night? The excitement would keep everyone hungry and ready to chow down! - Time Drain.
Honestly, the amount of time I spend failing at cooking could be better spent ordering pizza and diving straight into bath time. - Boredom Central.
Let’s be real—watching chicken cook isn’t exactly thrilling. You can’t even zone out for a second without risking a kitchen disaster. - Messy Madness.
Clean cooking? Not a thing. Even if I clean as I go, food somehow manages to escape and create chaos everywhere. Cooking is like a never-ending art project—no matter how careful you are, there’s always a mess left behind. - Stress Levels Through the Roof.
You’ll never catch a contestant on Hell’s Kitchen dodging a toddler while trying to whip up dinner. With kids in the mix, it feels more like a scene from The Hunger Games than a relaxing cooking experience. - Complexity Overload.
Once I stray from the trusty taco or spaghetti recipes, it gets complicated. Suddenly, I’m faced with terms like “sauté” and “braise,” which sound fancy but really just mean spending an eternity in the kitchen. - The Disappearing Act.
Unless I’m serving up peanut butter sandwiches or those yogurt cups with M&Ms, my culinary creations usually end up as sad, untouched servings on their plates. - Endless Dishes.
No escaping it. Even if we ate off paper plates, I’d still have to clean the pots and pans. Trust me, I’ve tried cooking on paper plates, and it’s a disaster. - Prep Time Nightmare.
Grocery shopping, hauling everything home, and prepping it all takes way too much time. Whether I’m meal prepping for the week or just trying to throw together something quick, it all eats into my day. - Leftover Land.
Also known as “the science experiment in the fridge.” You know, the food no one touched that’s now growing its own ecosystem.
For those of us who share this cooking aversion, it feels like a necessary evil. “Let them eat cake,” we say, just as long as we’re not the ones baking it! Eating out every day isn’t feasible, so I try to keep things simple for myself and the kids. Maybe one day I’ll find the time to actually enjoy cooking, but right now, I’d rather order a pizza than face another culinary catastrophe.
If you’re interested in exploring more about family-oriented topics, check out this post on home insemination kits for some helpful insights. For more resources on pregnancy, visit the World Health Organization’s page on pregnancy.
Summary:
Cooking for my family is a daily struggle filled with demands, stress, and endless messes. Despite attempts to enjoy it, I often find myself wishing for a quick pizza delivery instead.