Even though I’m surrounded by a bunch of boys, they’re still quite young—thankfully, there are no hidden adult magazines or secretive online browsing habits yet. I wish I could think that they won’t be curious about such things (ideally, I’d prefer they didn’t think about anything sexual until they’re well into their twenties), but I know that day is coming sooner than I’d like.
Before they start to see images of women with flawless, airbrushed bodies—those impossibly perfect figures depicted in magazines and movies—I’m determined to show them a different reality: my own body.
Our home isn’t exactly modest. I’m not one to walk around naked, and I often find myself saying, “Put some pants on!” more than anything else. However, I’ve never hesitated to change clothes in front of them, leave the bathroom door open while I shower, or nurse my babies without a cover. It’s important for them to understand what a real woman’s body looks like.
If I don’t show them, and their first impressions of a naked woman come from those unrealistic images, what kind of expectations will they form as they grow up? And what woman could possibly meet those expectations?
I struggle with my post-baby body, but for the sake of my boys—and my future daughters-in-law—I put on a brave face and project confidence. When they ask about my stretch marks, I proudly tell them they’re like badges of honor earned from bringing life into the world. (Gaming references work wonders when explaining things to them!)
Although I sometimes want to retreat when they poke my squishy belly, I allow them to feel it. Do I dislike it? Absolutely! I might want to shout, “Don’t touch my tummy!” and run for a baggy shirt or even consider liposuction. But I don’t, because right now, my body is their only frame of reference for femininity. To them, it’s nothing less than beautiful.
I tell them how strong I am, and they see me workout regularly and make healthy choices while still enjoying my favorite desserts. Even when I feel frustrated with my body, I maintain a sense of pride in front of my boys.
Promoting a positive body image is crucial, not just for daughters but for sons too. It helps them feel good about their own bodies and appreciate the beauty of real women. I want them to understand that sagging skin or a bit of extra weight is perfectly normal. They need to know that these are part of life—not the unrealistic, digitally altered images they’ll encounter.
Sure, they may be drawn to those idealized forms, but I hope they’ll remember that those aren’t the standards for women’s bodies. In the future, I’m sure I’ll hear them say, “Mom, could you please get dressed?” or they’ll learn to knock before entering the bathroom, and I won’t mind one bit.
But for now, I’ll let them explore my stretch marks and giggle at how my body moves when I walk across the room. I want to plant the seed of acceptance, so when they’re older and their partners express insecurities about their bodies, my sons will confidently say, “You’re perfect just the way you are.” And they will truly mean it.
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Summary:
In a world saturated with unrealistic body images, a mother shares her journey to teach her sons about the beauty of a real woman’s body—her own. By embracing her post-baby figure and fostering a positive body image, she hopes to instill confidence in her boys so they can appreciate women as they are, beyond societal expectations.