Oct. 24, 2016
Moving is a hassle at any point in life. Sorting through piles of belongings, wondering how you accumulated so much clutter, trying to find packing supplies, and wrapping fragile items in whatever you can scrounge up. The lifting, hauling, and carrying leave you with sore arms, bruised fingers, and broken nails. Not to mention the cleaning of the old space. And then comes the arduous task of settling into your new home. It’s truly exhausting. Yet, moving with children adds a whole new layer of complexity, especially if they’re of school age. Among the countless items packed, you also carry an immense weight of parental guilt and anxiety.
When my partner received an offer for his dream job seven hours away, saying no was not an option. But the moment he accepted, I was consumed with worry about how our decision might impact our children’s lives. I imagined them struggling to adjust, unable to make new friends, and feeling isolated and sad. I couldn’t shake the thought that they might someday look back and blame this move for their unhappiness. After all, they had no say in the matter.
The choice to relocate was made solely by my partner and me, the “Adults” (most of the time, anyway). We essentially told our kids, “Hey, we’re uprooting your lives without your input!” Sure, I often make decisions for them, but this felt different. It was more significant than the usual “eat your vegetables” or “brush your teeth.” It’s tough being a kid when major adult decisions don’t consider your feelings—even if, in the long run, it’s for their benefit.
They had to leave their school.
I vividly recall stepping into Maplewood Elementary as the anxious parent of a brand-new kindergartner. Fast forward six years, and I was tearfully saying goodbye to the amazing staff who had cared for and nurtured all three of my kids. These teachers knew my children intimately; they understood their quirks and special needs. What if their next school was nothing like this one? What if they didn’t fit in at all?
They had to leave their friends.
Did I love all of their friends? Not particularly. There was that one kid who did something unspeakable in our backyard and another who taught my 6-year-old some colorful language. Yet, despite my reservations, these were the friends my kids had chosen, sharing countless hours of laughter and adventure. Childhood friendships leave lasting impressions, and now we were moving them away from their crew into a completely unfamiliar environment.
They had to leave our neighborhood.
We were fortunate to live in a community filled with kind neighbors, people I could trust. My children knew that if they ever needed anything, they could count on anyone on our street. Our neighbors patched up scraped knees, took them on nature walks, and always had extra Halloween candy. What if our new neighbors weren’t as friendly? What if they disliked kids?
They had to leave our home.
My eldest was only 2 when we bought our first house, and the others had never lived anywhere else. This was the only home they’d ever known, their safe haven, a place they could navigate with their eyes closed. They knew all the escape routes in case of emergencies. Now, they’d wake up in an unfamiliar setting (and I’d have to remind them a million times where everything goes).
In the end, the move was smoother than I had dreaded. All my fears turned out to be exaggerated, and the kids adapted well. I hadn’t given them enough credit for their resilience. We met their new teachers and took them on a tour of the new school. We made introductions to our new neighbors and used technology to help the kids keep in touch with their old friends. They enjoyed exploring our new house and backyard. We took walks and drives, uncovering the hidden gems of our new community, and jumped right into local library programs.
Yes, they miss our old neighborhood—and so do I—but in time, we’ll create just as many memories here. After all, our previous house was once new too.
For more insights on family planning and home insemination, check out our other blog post here. Additionally, for a reliable resource on pregnancy, visit Healthline. And if you’re looking for essentials related to home insemination, Make a Mom is a trusted authority on the topic.
Summary
Moving is challenging, especially for families, as it brings feelings of guilt and anxiety. When faced with a relocation, parents often worry about their children’s adjustment, friendships, and sense of belonging. After a stressful move, it’s important to recognize the resilience of children and to create new memories in a fresh environment.