Updated: October 31, 2017
Originally Published: September 22, 2016
There’s a delicate balance between enthusiasm and obsession, especially when it comes to open-concept layouts, quartz countertops, and “airy and inviting” design choices. If you’re a fervent HGTV follower, you may find yourself caught in its addictive allure, making it hard to step away from any program on the network. Before long, you’re repainting every room a shade of gray and can even name the pets of your favorite home renovation stars.
Here are some telltale signs that you might be watching a bit too much HGTV:
- You apply to every home makeover show season after season, despite living nowhere near Los Angeles.
- You can easily distinguish between the Property Brothers and have a favorite.
- You casually refer to your bathroom as an en suite.
- You can identify traditional versus contemporary styles, yet your wardrobe remains a mystery.
- Each year, you enter the HGTV Dream Home Giveaway, convinced this will be the year you land that chic guest room and beachy living area.
- You dream of being adopted by the Thompson family.
- You find yourself offering tile advice to couples at Home Depot, despite their quest for potting soil.
- You genuinely believe that the key to life’s problems is a well-designed open floor plan with calming neutral hues.
- You use terms like “aesthetic” and “rustic” to describe your meals.
- You brainstorm ideas to turn your garden shed into a rental property.
- You think your yard absolutely needs both a fire pit and a fountain to complement the stylish pagoda your partner swears they can build, even though they struggle with IKEA furniture.
- You feel an unusual thrill whenever they remove old carpet, hoping to uncover beautiful hardwood floors.
- You get frustrated when others can’t appreciate the potential hidden beneath outdated decor.
- You shake your head in disbelief when a couple exceeds their budget by moving a load-bearing wall.
- You stage your living room with exactly nine limes in a bowl.
- You ask for a belt sander for your birthday.
- Your baby’s first words are “curb appeal.”
- You’ve visited Waco, Texas, more times than most people go to music festivals.
- You have endless respect for the original HGTV star, Bob Vila.
- You watch every episode and think, “I could absolutely do that.”
- You’re baffled when a couple chooses House No. 2, which is clearly not suited for them.
- You hope that David and Sarah will date and create a show called “Just Love It, Because They Will Never List It.”
- You decide that every room in your house requires a makeover and are certain you can finish it all in a weekend, including major renovations.
- You name your pet cat “Shiplap.”
- You evaluate homes based on whether they have double ovens and warming drawers.
- You assure yourself you could completely revamp your yard even though you’re clueless about basic landscaping principles.
- Your partner returns home to find a wall knocked down, and you casually mention that you’re flipping it.
- You lose sleep worrying about the absence of accent walls in your space.
- You believe a successful marriage hinges on having a double sink vanity and a bidet.
- You want reclaimed wood to be the primary feature in your home decor.
HGTV is like a visual addiction. Once you start watching, it’s hard to stop. You may find yourself planning an elaborate pool featuring a 15-foot waterfall and a swim-up bar, convinced it’s the ultimate entertainment space. HGTV embodies our ideal visions of home and life, making it irresistible to watch. It’s all about dreaming big, especially when those dreams include an open-concept layout and soothing color schemes.
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Summary
This article humorously outlines the signs of being overly enamored with HGTV, highlighting how its influence can shape your perceptions of home improvement and lifestyle choices. From amusing anecdotes about home renovations to the desire for trendy decor, it’s clear that HGTV has a profound impact on its viewers.