As a mom of three, I’ve met a lot of other parents. Some are older, some are younger, and we all have our own unique approaches to parenting, from the ultra-strict (my kids think I fit this mold) to the more laid-back. Some parents enjoy a drink and a bit of swearing, while others maintain a pristine lifestyle. But no matter our differences, we all share two common goals: 1) We don’t want to raise little brats, and 2) it’s incredibly challenging not to.
We educate, encourage, and strive to model better behavior for our children, yet somehow they still manage to repeat the very actions we just punished them for. Kids aren’t programmed robots; they come into the world as naturally selfish beings who want things their way, and every day we face the challenge of curbing that bratty behavior. Here’s what can make it difficult:
You Had a Great Day Yesterday, and Now You’re Exhausted.
Yesterday was a win! I was fully present, I baked and crafted with the kids, and even lost a game of Risk to my nine-year-old. But today? I’m completely drained. So when my son asks Siri if she has to go to the bathroom, I might just pretend I didn’t hear him while I scroll through my single friend’s Tinder escapades on Facebook with a glass of wine in hand. I wish I could be “on” all the time, but that’s just not realistic — and I bet you feel the same way.
We Can’t See Everything They Do.
We aren’t omnipresent. Despite telling my kids I have eyes in the back of my head, it’s not true. When I call out, “If you act like a jerk, I’ll hear about it,” there are times I truly won’t. Sometimes I wish I could catch every single act of mischief, but I’ve noticed that when another adult steps in to address their behavior, it has a significant impact. I don’t ignore my kids in hopes someone else will intervene; it just happens that way. And those moments when another adult catches them can actually make them behave better, even if it looks like they’re being little terrors.
Sometimes We Give In to Survive the Day.
I know the “perfect” parents would never admit this, but I will: I’m not perfect. Occasionally, I cave and buy that stuffed animal or oversized ice cream just to make it through the day without losing my cool. Sometimes my kids don’t deserve it, but I do it anyway because the alternative feels too overwhelming. We all have our moments when we need to salvage both our sanity and the day ahead. This can mean strolling through Target with a gigantic bear while my child enjoys an Icee and I try to focus on a shopping list.
They Face Temptations.
Kids see their peers acting out and think it looks like fun. They might want to grab a handful of mints on the way out of a restaurant because they noticed Tommy doing it. Or maybe they’re seeking your attention but don’t know how to express it, so they decide to play with your makeup instead. The world is full of temptations, and it’s tough for kids to learn self-control when they’re focused on instant gratification.
You’re Not Feeling Well.
Trying to parent while sick is the absolute worst. Kids know they can get away with chaos when you’re down for the count. They might finger paint the walls or have a bath with the dog while you’re stuck on the couch. By the time you’re back on your feet, punishing them just feels pointless. You’re just grateful to have made it through, and all you want to do is take them out for a movie or ice cream because you feel guilty about not being able to engage for a couple of days.
They’re Having a Rough Day Too.
Everyone has bad days, even kids. Just like adults who might procrastinate on chores, kids sometimes need an outlet. If they could say, “I needed to chill before tackling my responsibilities,” they’d sound a bit bratty, right? But we all have those days!
Every child has their bratty moments, and every parent works hard to avoid raising one. So the next time you see a little one acting up, remember that their parents are likely trying their best. Or at least they were yesterday and are just worn out today. And above all, be thankful it’s not your little rascal causing all the ruckus this time.
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In summary, parenting is a tough job, and every day presents its unique challenges. While we strive not to raise little brats, sometimes circumstances lead us to moments of weakness. We’re all in this together, trying to navigate the tricky waters of parenthood.