As I stood in the thick, steamy air with my kids waiting for the band to start playing, I felt a wave of nostalgia wash over me. We were at a family-friendly music festival, and I was buzzing with excitement to see a cover band I had loved since my college days. Not only was I eager to relive those cherished memories, but I also couldn’t wait for my children to experience the thrill of live music from a band that never failed to deliver. At ages 10 and 13, my kids were the perfect companions for my husband and me as we caught up with friends for the concert. They had yet to witness “concert Mom” in action, and I knew they were in for a memorable night.
As the sweat trickled down my back and the crowd surged forward, I couldn’t help but reflect on how long it had taken to reach this point. With no strollers, toddlers in tow, or the need to pack baby food, we were stepping into a whole new world of freedom. Taking our kids to a concert felt exhilarating and refreshing. I glanced at my son’s eager face, marked with adolescent acne, and smiled. My daughter, on my other side, was practically bouncing with excitement, despite struggling to see over the taller attendees in front of her.
When the band kicked off their performance, my kids were completely captivated, especially my daughter. I tried to lift her for a better view, but the tightly packed crowd made it nearly impossible. However, I spotted a small opening near the front of the stage, just right for my petite 50-pound 10-year-old. Gently, we maneuvered closer, and when we reached the front, I let her squeeze in. I stayed a couple of people back to respect the other fans, keeping an eye on her as the stage lights danced in her hair.
Her face lit up like a Christmas tree when the lead singer acknowledged her. She radiated joy as she watched the drummer, and her enthusiasm was infectious. Just as she turned to flash me a thumbs up and a beaming smile, I reached for my phone to capture the moment.
But before I could snap the picture, a woman suddenly thrust her hand in front of my phone. “Is that your little girl?” she shouted over the music. When I confirmed it was, she began berating me, claiming my daughter was a nuisance. “This is no place for a child!” she yelled, her face flushed with anger. “I didn’t come here with my adult kids to have my night spoiled by your little kid!”
I stood there, stunned and speechless, as the sounds of Bon Jovi faded into the background. Not wanting to escalate the situation, I gently pulled my daughter back to where my husband and son were waiting. The rest of the night, I simmered with frustration at the woman’s rudeness and utter lack of compassion for a small child.
As a parent of older kids, it’s easy to overlook the challenges that come with raising little ones. Our days filled with strollers and diapers feel like a distant memory, and I’m increasingly reminded of how far we’ve come in these 13 years. While I’m secretly relieved not to be the mom handling a tantrum in the grocery aisle, I made a promise to myself long ago to always extend kindness to mothers with young children navigating their own struggles.
I will gladly let a mom with a toddler and a newborn take the bathroom stall ahead of me; I can hold it. A 3-year-old can’t.
I’ll always offer to help a mother load her car or hold her infant while her toddler has a meltdown. I’ll look into her weary eyes and say, “I’ve been there.”
I’ll be available to help friends with young kids make it to appointments alone—no one needs a toddler peeking during a gynecologist visit.
I’ll keep a stash of juice boxes and goldfish crackers ready for the mom friend who forgets her diaper bag. Sorry, can’t help with a high chair though.
And I won’t forget how it feels to be scolded by an annoyed older mother who has clearly forgotten that her college-aged kids once needed a boost to see over a crowd.
When I eventually find myself as the older mom at a concert, I will be the first to offer my shoulders so that a child can enjoy the band up close.
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In summary, it’s essential to remember the challenges of parenting young children, as they shape our perspectives and empathy. We must strive to support one another and share kindness, especially towards parents navigating the demanding journey of raising little ones.