The Secret to My Lasting Marriage

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This month marks the 27th anniversary of the day my partner and I met. I say “celebrate,” but truthfully, we’ll likely let it slip by unnoticed.

Having known each other for 27 years means I’ve spent more of my life with him than without him. It didn’t take us long to realize that our connection would extend beyond those initial few dates. Sure, part of that was because he needed someone to feed his dog while he attended evening classes, but that’s a story for another time.

Of course, we’ve encountered some bumps along the way to our “happily ever after,” but after nearly three decades together, I’m confident we’ve built something truly solid. We find joy in each other’s company, even on the days when things aren’t perfect.

So, what’s the secret behind our enduring marriage? Here are a few reasons that might suggest we shouldn’t work as a couple – yet we do:

1. Diverse Interests: While we share core values and life goals, our interests often diverge. I admire couples who bond over shared hobbies like gardening or cooking, but we prefer to spend our time lounging, napping, and watching TV.
2. Not My Type: You might wonder how I’ve been with someone who doesn’t fit my “type” for so long. Although my list of ideal partners includes names like Chris Hemsworth and Denzel Washington, my husband, who has a fair complexion and now distinguished gray hair, undeniably has his own charm. After all these years, attraction transcends just physical appearance.
3. Shoe Policy: My husband wears his shoes inside the house, which I initially found perplexing. I’m the type who kicks off my shoes the moment I walk through the door, but he prefers to keep them on, even on lazy weekends. It took a while, but I’ve learned to accept his footwear habits.
4. Football Fanatic: My husband is a die-hard football fan, which can be a challenge. Growing up with a father who was equally passionate about the sport, I never thought I’d marry someone who shares that same enthusiasm. Thankfully, he doesn’t bet on games like my dad did.
5. Reading Habits: I love to dive into books, while my husband’s reading is more casual. It’s a good balance; I can immerse myself in a novel while he watches his favorite games.
6. Movie Preferences: He’s a fan of war and prison films, while I’d prefer to skip them entirely. Luckily, he allows me to choose our movie nights, and he’s always there with popcorn.
7. Saving vs. Spending: My husband is a saver, and I’m a spender. If it were up to him, we’d still be using the mismatched furniture he had before we met. Thankfully, I’ve helped elevate our living space over the years.
8. Different Activity Levels: He loves outdoor activities, while I prefer a more relaxed lifestyle. Despite his wishes for me to join him in hiking or paddleboarding, I’m afraid that’s just not in my nature.
9. Culinary Backgrounds: My husband hails from Wisconsin, where bratwurst reigns supreme, while I grew up in New York, where hot dogs are king. It’s a cultural blend that adds a fun twist to our meals.

So, what’s the key to our enduring partnership? We consciously choose to love one another every single day. Even on those tough days when we might not want to be in the same room. Whether he’s passionately cheering for his team, devouring bratwurst, or I’m hiding with a book, we commit to making it work.

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In summary, love is a choice we make daily, regardless of our differences. It’s not always easy, but it’s certainly worth it.