In my home, intimate moments with my husband are a regular occurrence. Now, before you rush to judgment, let me clarify this crucial point in all caps: HE DOES NOT EXPECT IT, NOR WOULD HE EVER DEMAND IT. If he ever approached me with an expectation, I’d promptly redirect him to where he could go—somewhere not very pleasant, mind you.
These daily acts of intimacy are entirely my choice. It’s not about fulfilling any “wifely duty” or thinking I owe him anything because he brings home the bacon. That kind of thinking is outdated and frankly silly. I’m not trying to manipulate or bribe him into doing something nice for me; he doesn’t leave cash on the nightstand afterward!
It’s simply this wonderful realization that I genuinely enjoy making him happy, and intimacy is a great way to achieve that. I engage in this act not out of obligation but because I love him. It’s as straightforward as that.
If you’ve ever been intimate with a long-term partner, you know it’s generally a quick process. (Unless you’re not being careful, in which case, look for a helpful tutorial!) Taking just a few minutes to do something that brings him joy? Why wouldn’t I want to do that?
Of course, this doesn’t have to be about intimacy. If your partner’s love language is cooking, swap out the intimate moments for a delicious homemade meal. Maybe you surprise them with their favorite snack after a long day. These little gestures, big or small, can really brighten someone’s day. In my case, it just happens to be a bit more intimate.
This practice has a ripple effect. You’d be amazed at how easy it is to live with someone who feels appreciated and loved regularly. A happy partnership contributes to a harmonious family life, benefiting everyone involved. On top of that, there’s even research suggesting that frequent intimacy can have health benefits—much like when I remind him to take his vitamins!
Now, if you’re sitting there thinking that you could never engage in such acts regularly, let me assure you: it’s completely voluntary, and there are times when I simply don’t want to. I won’t engage if I’m feeling unwell, upset, or just not in the mood.
When I do choose to be intimate, he knows it’s a selfless act of love, not a chore or an expectation. There’s nothing demeaning about it because the choice is mine to make. In fact, I find it empowering—especially in a world that often makes me question my worth and capabilities.
Sometimes, after a long day of parenting, I might be too exhausted for traditional intimacy. That’s when I find that a quick moment of intimacy can be a great substitute. While it’s not a replacement for deeper connection, it can serve a purpose, satisfying both of us for a peaceful night’s rest.
I understand this may not resonate with everyone; some might have their own reasons for hesitance. But if you’re open to it, you might find that surprise acts of intimacy could have a positive impact—much more than a simple cup of coffee in the morning ever could.
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In summary, the key is finding what works for you and your partner, whether that’s through intimate moments or simple gestures of love. Happy relationships thrive on appreciation and kindness, and everyone can benefit from that.