Parenting is quite the journey, and it feels like the stages of motherhood shift so rapidly that I can barely keep pace. Recently, amidst one of those chaotic mornings that left me feeling defeated and questioning my abilities, I found pride in the mother I am evolving into.
I’ve learned to accept myself more fully. I no longer let the opinions of others about my parenting weigh me down. More importantly, when I stumble, instead of being harsh on myself, I’ve started to let it go, learn from it, and move forward.
I let my kids witness my emotions. They see me cry and express frustration, which I once thought was something I needed to hide to protect them. I believed that by keeping my emotions in check, I was shielding them from the harsher realities of life. What a misjudgment that was! If I reacted to something upsetting on the news or let out a curse after stubbing my toe, I feared it would frighten them. I thought I needed to model unwavering self-control. While I still value composure, I also recognize that it’s okay to not always have it together. I am human, and juggling the happiness of three little ones is incredibly challenging. Sometimes, I just want to lose myself in a book without interruptions.
I’m becoming more comfortable asking for what I need, whether it’s from friends, family, or even my kids. I’ve realized that asking for help doesn’t signify weakness; I want my children to understand the importance of supporting one another and seeking assistance when required. They’ve seen me ask for help often, and I intend to continue this practice. I hope they learn that their mother was strong enough to articulate her needs for the well-being of our family.
Lately, I’ve adopted a “whatever” attitude. The house doesn’t always have to be spotless, forgetting something isn’t catastrophic, and it’s perfectly fine to be late occasionally. Life happens, and most people understand that.
I’ve also become adept at saying no. If something feels overwhelming, I simply decline. If I’m too tired or just not in the mood, I say no without guilt.
Every day, I’m growing stronger by learning from my missteps, which sometimes feel monumental but rarely are. My kids are thriving, and so am I.
I’m learning to prioritize myself more. In the past, I struggled with this notion, often believing that taking time for myself was a sign of weakness. How wrong I was! It turns out I needed those moments of self-care, like enjoying a margarita and having a night to myself.
I’ve evolved not by perfecting elaborate meals or craft projects but by becoming more at ease in my role as a mother. I’ve figured out what works for me and what makes me feel inadequate. I’ve learned that self-criticism isn’t productive—moving on is. And sometimes, it’s liberating to just say “whatever.”
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Summary
Parenting is a challenging but rewarding journey, and self-acceptance plays a crucial role in growth. By allowing emotions to show, asking for help, and prioritizing self-care, mothers can embrace their evolving identities while managing the chaos of family life.