Last night was a true test of parenting endurance. With my partner out of town, our regular nanny and backup nanny both had recent schedule changes that left them unavailable, and my reliable friend who usually steps in was tied up at an event. So, I found myself alone, managing three kids while battling one of the worst migraines I’ve had in years.
I recalled the last time I suffered through such agony; our previous full-time nanny had come to the rescue, swooping in to help with bedtime when I could barely keep my eyes open. When I woke from that haze, I found the dishes done, the house tidy, and the children peacefully tucked in. If I had any doubts about my love for her before, they vanished in that moment.
Now, however, my beloved nanny has moved away, and I was left with a piercing headache that made every sound feel like nails on a chalkboard. I could barely function, but I was grateful for having prepared dinner ahead of time. I managed to plate the kids’ meals and pour their drinks before curling up on the couch, issuing commands to my newly promoted 5-year-old babysitters. “Is your baby sister finished? Can you get her some fruit? Make sure she doesn’t stand up in her high chair!”
In my moment of pride for creating adorable fruit skewers, I suddenly feared for my toddler’s safety. Thankfully, my son was quick to help, removing each piece of fruit from the skewer and setting it on her tray. As the clock struck 5, I felt overwhelmed, questioning how I would get everyone bathed, teeth brushed, and into pajamas. My 5-year-olds’ chatter pierced through my headache like daggers, and I could feel my toddler’s curious eyes on me, repeatedly calling out, “Mama, Mama.”
After some time, my little assistants announced that their sister was done eating. I took a deep breath and summoned what little energy I had left to clean her up, only to discover she had stuck a corn kernel up her nose—an unfortunate first. Drawing on my years of experience, I managed to extract it, but not without the realization that I needed to add a new item to my babysitting checklist: “Make sure she doesn’t stick food up her nose!”
As I got my toddler ready for bed, I felt spent. Normally, she would go to sleep at 7, but I knew I couldn’t go another hour. So she was tucked in at 6:15, and I felt accomplished just to have gotten her into pajamas. I called down to my 5-year-olds, declaring a bath and tooth-brushing holiday. They settled in with me to watch cartoons, while I occasionally ducked away to deal with my nausea.
In an unprecedented twist, I asked them to tuck themselves in. To my surprise, they complied. My son tucked me in and turned off the lights before slipping into their own rooms. As the silence enveloped me, I felt immense gratitude for my children, and I lay in darkness wishing the pain would fade.
Thankfully, the pain did subside, and today I’m back on my feet. While some may argue that a sick child shouldn’t keep you from work and that everyone should have multiple backup plans, not everyone is fortunate enough to have a solid support system. I am grateful that these overwhelming moments are rare for me, and I can only imagine the strength of those navigating parenthood without a village.
To all the parents out there managing without a network, I admire your resilience. As long as your kids are fed, their teeth are brushed occasionally, and they get bathed sometimes, you’re doing an amazing job.
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Summary:
Navigating parenting without reliable support can be a daunting challenge, especially on difficult days. This article recounts a night filled with chaos and headache, highlighting the struggles of managing three children alone. It emphasizes the strength of parents who do not have a village to rely on and celebrates the small victories that come with parenting, such as keeping kids fed and safe.