A colleague recently shared an inspiring story about a mom who whispered for an entire week, resulting in a transformative experience. Was she trying to send me a message? Writer Vanessa Bell reflects on how we can reach a boiling point where we find ourselves shouting at our kids. To explore this, she decided to ditch yelling for a week and embrace whispering instead. During her experiment, she noticed improved focus, fewer tantrums, a calmer demeanor, and happier kids. I thought I’d give it a shot today, but the universe had different ideas. Just as I was about to start, THE NOISEY GARDENER ARRIVED WITH A LEAF BLOWER. My mother, who struggles to hear, misinterpreted my gentle request for her to feed the baby, exclaiming, “WHAT?” When I tried again, she looked at me as if I was the biggest jerk. “ARE YOU WHISPERING? WHY ARE YOU WHISPERING?” That’s when I decided to yell for an hour and see what would happen.
First off, everyone in the house could hear me over the annoying leaf blower noise, so that was a plus. My toddler seemed to thrive on the commotion. When I shouted, “HEY KID! WANT TO WATCH WALLYKAZAM SO YOU CAN GIVE ME SOME PEACE AND I CAN WORK?” he gleefully yelled back, “YEEEESSSSSSS!” When his dad came to pick him up, I hollered, “HI HONEY! HE’S EATEN AND IS READY FOR A NAP!” He looked at me like I was a bit off and joked that I needed more coffee, which made me laugh. My son was practically bouncing off the walls when he left, also screaming, but that was no longer my concern since Dad was on duty for the day while I worked.
Here’s what I learned from an hour of yelling:
- I became less irritated by the leaf blower. I could hardly hear it over my own shouts, so it was a win-win situation.
- The bewildered expression on an infant’s face while I yelled at everyone during breastfeeding is pretty amusing.
- Yelling is entertaining for kids—if you’re not yelling at them, but rather with them.
- Yelling surprisingly boosts my energy levels. It’s like chanting during yoga—except, it’s definitely not the same thing, who am I kidding?
- It acts as a sort of hypnosis/therapy session. It takes me back to memories of having my very Anglo friends over for dinner in my Greek/Italian household, looking perplexed at all the yelling.
- My coworkers respond to every message I send as if it’s of utmost importance.
- My mother looks slightly concerned and might share her Xanax with me.
- I genuinely feel like I’ve had a workout.
This article was originally published on May 30, 2016.
Would you like more parenting insights? Check out our other posts at Home Insemination Kit for helpful tips! You can also learn more about fertility with trusted resources like Make a Mom. Additionally, if you’re looking for pregnancy information, MedlinePlus is an excellent resource.
Summary:
In an attempt to explore the effects of yelling versus whispering in parenting, I spent an hour yelling at my family and discovered that it surprisingly alleviated my annoyance, entertained my children, and even gave me an energy boost. While there were humorous moments and revelations, the experience reminded me of the chaotic yet loving nature of family life.