On a warm summer day in 2013, I quickly dropped off my daughter at a local horse farm for a day camp. At just 7 years old, she had a passion for all things equestrian, and her father and I had excitedly gifted her a week at horse camp for her birthday. She was thrilled to learn how to ride, groom, and care for her beloved animals, and I was looking forward to a few hours of peace at Target—everyone wins! As I watched her skip away with her group towards the stables, I sped off to the big red bullseye.
Twenty minutes later, coffee in hand, I was happily perusing the aisles of Target when my phone buzzed with three missed calls from an unfamiliar number. Just as I tried to figure out who it was, a fourth call came through from the same number. It was the camp director. “You need to come immediately,” she said. “Your daughter can’t breathe and is swelling up.”
I dropped my coffee and dashed out.
Upon arriving at the parking lot, I caught sight of my daughter: she was wheezing, her face swollen, eyes tightly shut, and her skin had turned a shade of red. Hives were visible on her arms and legs. Fear gripped my heart.
My daughter was experiencing an anaphylactic reaction to a horse, and we had no clue she had an allergy.
As an ICU nurse, I’m trained to keep a level head in emergencies. I’ve handled countless situations with clarity, providing treatment and guidance to others. But this was different.
This was my child, and she was in a crisis.
In a panic, I made the worst decision possible: I scooped her up, placed her in the car, and sped to the doctor’s office. As she struggled to breathe beside me, all my nursing instincts vanished. I was fearful and distracted, and by the time we reached the doctor’s office, I realized how I had worsened the situation by not waiting for emergency services. To this day, I can’t believe I let nearly two decades of nursing experience slip away in my moment of panic.
In the days that followed, we faced medications, steroid treatments, visits to allergists, and lab tests. My heart sank when we learned not only about her life-threatening allergy to horses but also about a long list of food and environmental allergens that her body was battling daily. We suddenly had a child with significant medical challenges that had somehow gone unnoticed for years.
For the next few months, equipped with EpiPens and a deeper understanding of her triggers, we quietly informed those around us about her new condition. Babysitters, troop leaders, and close friends learned how to administer an epinephrine injection in case of an emergency. We collaborated with her school nurse and teachers to create a care plan for her school days. Most importantly, we educated our daughter about her diagnosis, teaching her to recognize the physical signs of an allergic reaction. We even established a hand gesture she could use if she struggled to speak. We practiced different scenarios so she would feel prepared when she was with friends or teachers.
We did everything we could to ensure her allergies became our concern, not a burden for others.
Today, allergies seem to be a hot topic. It seems like every time you turn around, someone has a new allergy, whether it’s to peanuts or dairy. Parents often express frustration over restrictions on homemade treats in classrooms, and the debate over allergy safety continues to rage. Unfortunately, there are no perfect solutions.
As the parent of a child with allergies, I refuse to be “that” mom. I don’t ask for special treatment beyond what is necessary for her safety. If we attend a party and she can’t eat something, she simply doesn’t eat it and enjoys her friends instead. I don’t call ahead for playdates to discuss her dietary restrictions; instead, I discreetly send food she can safely eat to class when I know a party is coming. We strive to approach her allergies as our responsibility rather than expecting society to cater to them. After all, she’ll have to navigate these issues for her entire life, and it’s our job to ensure she feels empowered and equipped to do so. It’s unreasonable to expect everyone to avoid her allergens—her list is just too extensive.
People are often surprised to learn about her many allergies because we don’t focus on her medical issues. Her allergies are just one small part of who she is, and I prefer to share stories of her accomplishments, like how she excelled in her 400m race or how adorable she looks in her new glasses. While I occasionally connect with other parents in similar situations, I’d rather discuss my writing or what I bought at Target when I finally had the chance to shop without a horse interruption.
Helpful Tips for Allergic Reactions
If you ever find yourself in a situation where your child is experiencing an allergic reaction, here are some helpful tips:
- Call 911. Let the professionals handle the driving so you can concentrate on your child.
- Try to identify what your child ate and in what quantity, as this information can be crucial at the hospital.
- Keep your child’s up-to-date height and weight handy on your phone for accurate emergency medication dosing.
For more information, check out this excellent resource on pregnancy and home insemination from the NHS. And if you’re interested in learning about home insemination kits, visit Make A Mom, a great authority on the subject. For additional insights, you can also explore this blog post for more relevant information.
In summary, my daughter’s close call with an unknown allergy was a startling wake-up call. It taught us the importance of education and preparation in managing allergies, ensuring she feels empowered while we navigate these challenges together.