When various people—including my child’s preschool teacher—suggested that I should consider delaying my son’s entry into kindergarten for a year, my immediate reaction was confusion.
He celebrated his 5th birthday in the spring leading up to kindergarten. Isn’t that the standard age for starting? Sure, he was a bit “younger” compared to his peers: he struggled to maintain focus during preschool lessons and had difficulty writing his letters neatly. He displayed no eagerness to start reading. But honestly, I wondered, what could be so challenging about kindergarten?
Back when I attended kindergarten in the late 1970s, our classroom featured a huge slide and a sandbox. Kindergarten was a half-day filled with play—games on the playground, building with blocks, and napping while the teacher read stories.
However, it only took me a short time to discover that the kindergarten experience has drastically changed. Reading articles that described kindergarten as the “new first grade” or even “second grade,” I began asking parents of older kids about their experiences and became frustrated by the academic expectations set by the Common Core.
I used to think that parents who chose to hold their children back a year were merely trying to manipulate the system for competitive advantages. They wanted their kids to excel academically or athletically, hoping it would help them secure awards or college admissions down the line.
But now, I understand that many of these parents are simply trying to give their children an extra year of childhood, protecting them from a system that often demands too much from young kids. They realize that pushing academics on children who aren’t ready can lead to negative outcomes like lower self-esteem, increased anxiety, and poorer grades. They recognize that young children thrive through play-based learning rather than worksheets. Research even suggests that delaying kindergarten until age 7 can yield significant mental and academic benefits that last for years.
Children don’t develop at the same pace. We generally accept this idea when it comes to milestones such as walking. For instance, my daughter started walking at 15 months, while my friend’s child, who is the same age, walked at 9 months. But by age 2, you wouldn’t notice a difference between them. Likewise, studies show that whether kids learn to read early or later, they all reach similar literacy levels a few years down the line.
Considerations for Delaying Kindergarten
If you’re considering whether today’s kindergarten is suitable for your child, remember that it’s perfectly okay to take your time. Here are a few points to ponder:
- Check if your community offers a transitional kindergarten or “Young Fives” program. These initiatives were initially designed for kids with summer or late birthdays but now serve many children who might not be ready for kindergarten. These programs typically have a gentler academic focus and emphasize social skills and early literacy.
- Look into local schools that provide half-day programs. You might find charter or private schools nearby with shorter school days. And don’t fret about the price—many private schools offer generous financial aid.
- Consider homeschooling for kindergarten. This may not suit many working families (it wasn’t an option for me), but some friends chose to keep their kids home for an additional year before entering kindergarten.
- Investigate the specific expectations of the school before making a decision. Is there homework for kindergarteners? What’s the teacher-to-student ratio? How much recess is included? Many districts are starting to recognize that young children need more play and less homework.
- Advocate for change. If you have the luxury of choosing from various options, you’re fortunate. Many parents don’t have that choice. The ultimate solution is to reform the system that imposes unrealistic standards on young learners. Organizations like Defending the Early Years and Alliance for Childhood are great resources for learning how to get involved.
In the meantime, prioritize what’s best for your child.
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In summary, it’s completely acceptable to delay your child’s start in kindergarten if you feel they aren’t ready. Consider your options carefully, and remember that every child develops at their own pace.