“Does your mom like rock music?” Recently, one of my son’s friends asked him this after spotting me at a school fair. I couldn’t help but chuckle when my son relayed the question. I suppose the child asked because I didn’t quite fit in with the other parents, who were all sporting school shirts and buzzing with enthusiasm.
Unlike most of them, I have tattoos, piercings, and hair styled in dreads.
Sure, I can’t say for certain that no one else had hidden tattoos tucked away on their bodies, but I know I stood out like a vibrant, living canvas. While I felt confident in my skin, the other parents looked at me as if I’d just emerged from a wild adventure. They eyed me as if they’d never encountered a woman adorned with body art and colorful hair before.
Perhaps they hadn’t—at least not in this neighborhood.
I understand that not everyone appreciates tattoos and piercings, and that’s perfectly fine. However, in today’s world, it’s increasingly common to see them. So why was I receiving such bewildered stares? Ah, I see—the fact that I’m a mom. A mom with five small kids in an upscale school district. According to some societal norms, a mother like me shouldn’t have so many tattoos. What kind of example am I setting for my kids? GASP! What kind of mother would allow her children to witness this? I get it. Bring on the judgmental glares.
But just for the sake of clarity, let me explain what type of mother I truly am.
I’m a mother who loves her kids deeply—fiercely. My love for them is immense, so much so that I could get emotional just thinking about it. My tattoos don’t hinder my ability to love them.
I’m also a mother who enjoys endless fun with her children. We share laughter and jokes constantly. Their cleverness proves that my piercings don’t stop me from sharing joy with them.
I’m a mother who listens attentively to my kids. They can share their highs and lows with me, and I’ll always be there with open ears. When they need comfort, they can rest their heads on my chest, and I’ll hold them for as long as they desire. Dreads don’t prevent me from being a good listener.
I’m not one to brag often, but when it comes to my role as a mom: YES, I’m proud!
I strive to do my best every single day. My appearance has no bearing on my parenting skills. And you know what kind of message I convey to my children? It’s perfectly fine to embrace who you are. It’s okay to feel comfortable in your own skin. It’s alright to be so confident that some may call you vain. People will always have opinions, so why not live authentically?
I make an effort to see the good in others. My judgments are based on character, not looks. If someone assumes I’m not a good mother simply because of my appearance, that reflects more on them than on me.
I won’t dictate how you should raise your children, nor will I preach about teaching respect—it should be inherent. However, I will state this: My body modifications do not impact my abilities as a mother. I’m not the first mom to embrace this lifestyle, and I certainly won’t be the last. If you don’t like it, that’s your choice. You might just be missing out on getting to know a pretty fun person.
My kids are showered with love, and I believe they appreciate me just the way I am. They take pride in me, and I’m incredibly proud of them too. That pride is rooted in the heart, not in appearances. Yes, us boldly expressive parents have hearts too. So, see? We aren’t so different after all.
And to answer that little girl’s question: Yes, I absolutely enjoy rock music!
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Summary:
In this article, Jenna Rivera shares her experiences as a tattooed mom navigating the expectations of parenting in an affluent community. She reflects on the judgments she faces due to her appearance and passionately defends her parenting style, emphasizing love, fun, and authenticity. Tattoos and piercings don’t define her as a mother; rather, it’s the unconditional love and connection with her children that truly matter.