Let’s have a chat about what it means to “fail.” I won’t bore you with the tedious saga of our attempts to get our son, Leo, to sleep soundly in his own room. It’s reminiscent of a tale where we finally manage to push a hefty boulder uphill, only to have it roll back down and crush our hopes multiple times.
Eventually, he did learn to sleep on his own. But then life threw us a curveball—a bathroom renovation next to his bedroom and his first cold. Before long, Leo was back in our room, and not long after that, he was snuggled up in our bed. This return to co-sleeping, which many consider a major parenting blunder, is often treated with alarm. Yet, here’s a secret they don’t tell you: it feels absolutely wonderful.
Co-sleeping is a bit like a forbidden pleasure. People often get hooked on things that bring them joy, and while I can’t speak from experience, I know that failing at sleep training can be one of the most rewarding things you do as a parent.
When my son, with his wild hair and innocent demeanor, curls up between me and my lovely partner, it feels like a trip back to a blissful paradise. It’s a rare delight to witness the peaceful slumber of someone who is truly innocent, who doesn’t even know the weight of self-doubt. Waking up to the bright smile of a child who has no need for pretense is a gift. (This is also why Leo looks adorable in whatever he chooses to wear—he couldn’t care less about appearances.) In those moments, I feel enveloped by pure joy.
As I lie there at an hour when I might otherwise be working or out socializing, I find myself reminiscing about my younger years, filled with chic bars and art gallery openings. I recall the whirlwind of interesting conversations and the vibrant energy of bustling nights. Yet, in a moment that feels almost surreal, I realize there’s no place in the universe I’d rather be.
I have discovered the remedy for all my worries—the simple, magnetic joy of lying on a mattress with my son and partner, listening to the distant hum of the city beyond our walls, where countless others are still in search of what I’ve already found.
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In summary, while sleep-training was a struggle, our unexpected return to co-sleeping has brought an abundance of joy and connection.