I might be what some would call a “late bloomer.” Growing up in a conservative religious environment, I often felt out of place. Unlike most kids, I didn’t paint my nails, join sports teams, or hang out with friends on weekends. While peers indulged in Beanie-Weenies and Saturday morning cartoons, I was navigating a different version of the ’80s. It’s safe to say I had strict parents.
I was a vegetarian long before it became trendy, enjoying meat alternatives like “Big Franks” and “Stripples.” When dining out, I was the one asking for a hamburger without any meat. It wasn’t until my 20s that I tried a real hot dog, and soon after discovered the joys of pepperoni. Unclean meat is surprisingly tasty!
In my home, no one drank, swore, or wore jewelry. My ears remained unpierced, and our lifestyle was very simple. Television was limited, and movies were often deemed inappropriate, leaving me out of many pre-2000 pop culture references. I’ve never seen classics like Ferris Bueller’s Day Off or Sixteen Candles. My parents believed that everything we consume—whether it’s food or media—impacts our hearts and minds. Perhaps they were right, but it still drove me crazy not to be able to watch The Smurfs.
When I feel the urge to vent while preparing dinner for my family, I remember that I’ve never once heard my own mother curse. Living up to that standard can be a challenge (I’m working through my guilt), but it reassures me that it’s possible to parent with calmness. My parents showed me what a healthy marriage and family life look like, and I didn’t realize how blessed I was until later. Despite their conservativeness, they allowed me the freedom to make my own choices. I only recognized the oddity of my upbringing as I grew older, but I was genuinely happy.
From a young age, I explored the world around me with confidence. By age 7, I was canoeing alone, climbing trees, and racing through the woods on my bike. My parents didn’t hover; they gave me room to breathe. They observed from a distance, allowing me to explore, make mistakes, and learn from the outcomes. This sheltered environment helped me build an inner strength that I carried into adulthood, untainted by popular opinion—I simply didn’t know what it was.
When the time came to start dating, my experiences were far from ordinary. Even when I considered marrying someone my parents disapproved of, they respected my choices. I ultimately didn’t marry that person, but I appreciated their quiet support that let me navigate the situation on my own. They understood that good parenting isn’t about control; in fact, trying to control almost always backfires. Through their thoughtful guidance, I learned to make sound decisions.
A true late bloomer, I didn’t master makeup until well into adulthood, but the crucial part is that I did learn. I hope to preserve my children’s innocence and protect their childhood, taking my time with their growth—except when it comes to eyebrow plucking, that should definitely be expedited.
While my views may differ from my parents’ now that I have kids of my own, I’ve developed the ability to tune out external opinions and trust my instincts. This intuition is a result of years of listening to that inner voice. Ultimately, my upbringing taught me that being different isn’t a bad thing, and perhaps it’s one of the best gifts I could have received.
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Summary:
Growing up with strict parents shaped my unique perspective on freedom and self-discovery. Their conservative values provided a safe environment where I could explore and learn from my mistakes. Despite the challenges, I appreciate the independence and inner strength they fostered in me. As a parent now, I aim to protect my children’s innocence while allowing them the space to grow, trusting my instincts along the way.