By: Jessica Lane
Updated: Feb. 14, 2023
Having experienced both pregnancy and being under the influence, I can confidently say there are some striking parallels between these two states. Let’s explore them!
1. Heightened Emotions
Pregnant: You might not be teary-eyed every minute, but there will come a time when even the sight of a cat video sends you into a waterfall of tears.
Drunk: You could be having a grand time, but suddenly, you turn into the “I love you, man” type, or you might get emotional over a nostalgic tale about your childhood pet.
2. Nausea is Inevitable
Pregnant: If you’re not one of the lucky few who skip morning sickness, prepare to spend some quality time with your toilet, praying for relief. Spoiler: it rarely comes!
Drunk: If you didn’t know when to call it a night, you might find yourself in a similar position, begging for the sweet release of sobriety. Spoiler: it may not be as easy as you think!
3. Driving Becomes a No-Go
Pregnant: There’s no official law against driving while heavily pregnant, but with your bulging belly, sudden cramps, and mood swings, it’s best to let someone else take the wheel.
Drunk: Driving after drinking is a definite no-no. Just don’t do it!
4. Napping is a Frequent Pastime
Pregnant: You might sit down for a quick rest, only to wake up hours later, drooling all over the couch. Who knew a nap could feel so fantastic?
Drunk: You and a friend might think it’s a great idea to binge-watch Netflix, only to find yourself waking up in a daze, wondering what happened.
5. Memory is a Bit Foggy
Pregnant: Ever misplace your sunglasses or phone? Forget about putting laundry in the wash? It’s all part of the fun.
Drunk: You’ll likely experience the same confusion over your belongings—why is your phone in your shoe? Who knows! Better grab a snack and move on.
6. Food Choices Become Strange
Pregnant: Your cravings might lead you to eat things you never thought you would, but hey, you’re growing a human!
Drunk: Similarly, your late-night snack choices when inebriated can be quite bizarre, but a girl’s gotta soak up that alcohol!
7. Frequent Bathroom Breaks are a Must
Pregnant: Congratulations! Your bladder is now a victim of your growing uterus. You’ll find yourself rushing to the bathroom every 15 minutes.
Drunk: Once you “break the seal,” you’ll find yourself making constant trips to the restroom for the rest of the night.
8. Wardrobe Malfunctions Go Unnoticed
Pregnant: You may realize too late that your bump is sticking out, and you don’t care who sees it.
Drunk: You might forget you’re wearing a skirt and not think twice about flashing a bit of skin. It just happens!
9. You Vow to Never Do It Again
Pregnant: As you approach childbirth, you might think, “How do people do this repeatedly?” But once your baby arrives, you might reconsider!
Drunk: The morning after, you’ll swear off drinking, only to find yourself in the same situation a few weeks later.
These comparisons are not mere coincidences—many of us might have found ourselves in the family way after a few too many drinks. For more insights on home insemination, check out this related post. For those looking to explore options, visit Make a Mom for expert guidance. Additionally, if you’re curious about the process of in vitro fertilization, Wikipedia offers a wealth of information.
Summary:
Pregnancy and being drunk share many humorous similarities, from emotional highs and lows to frequent bathroom trips and strange food cravings. Both experiences can lead to memorable moments and the occasional mishap. Understanding these parallels can provide a lighthearted view of the challenges and joys of both states.