Right now, my daughter and I are in a bit of a standoff. She’s been rather difficult, so we’re taking some time apart. She’s holed up in her room, having slammed the door, and I’m in my own space doing the same because, as the parent, I deserve that little bit of drama!
The house is eerily quiet. I can hear my son climbing onto a stool in the kitchen, and when I glance out, I catch him sneaking a package of chocolate chip cookies. He carefully takes four and tiptoes to the shared bedroom he has with his sister. I watch as he opens the door just enough to squeeze inside and whispers, “Shhh, don’t tell Mom, but I thought you might want a cookie.”
This little act of rebellion is not new. Just a couple of weeks ago, after I sent him to his room for misbehaving at dinner, I pretended not to see when his sister brought him a slice of pizza.
And honestly, I love this. I cherish it when he defends his sister against my scolding, and vice versa. You see, the most furious I’ve been with my daughter was when I discovered she and her friends were teasing her brother, and the angriest I’ve been with him was when I learned he was mocking her.
On those occasions, we had serious conversations about loyalty and family. I told them that they need to support one another because that’s the essence of being family. The world outside can be harsh and chaotic, but they have each other, and that bond is invaluable.
At first, I was taken aback when they started to team up against me—it was two against one! “You need to listen to your mother!” I insisted. Their response? “But Mom! You said we need to have each other’s backs!”
In that moment, it clicked for me. In an ideal world, we would all get along perfectly, sharing brownies and frolicking in fields. There would be no bullies or injustice, and everyone would be kind. But we don’t live in that world, and sometimes they can be a handful—just like I can be.
What matters is that their bond is strong. They are each other’s greatest allies, and sometimes that means bending the rules I set.
One day, I won’t be there to protect them from life’s challenges. But I find comfort in knowing that they will always have each other to rely on, not just as siblings but as loyal allies who will stand together against whatever life throws at them.
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Summary
In this piece, I reflect on the dynamics between my children and how their ability to support each other, even when it means ganging up on me, fills me with gratitude. Their bond is a reminder of the importance of family, especially in a world that can often feel overwhelming.