Before you entered my life, I was unaware of the profound nature of love. I didn’t grasp that love resembles the universe: expansive, mysterious, and ever-growing. My heart remains the same, but the capacity for love within it has grown immensely since I became your mother.
Love is cradling you during those first precious moments of your life, shedding tears filled with countless emotions. It is battling fatigue to comfort you in the stillness of night. It’s gently brushing your hair as we share whispers in your room before sleep overtakes you. I cherish these serene moments, fully aware they are fleeting. Soon enough, you’ll be frustrated and demanding to know why your favorite shirt is missing, hurling questions that feel impossible to answer. While I could respond with a multitude of reasons or suggest you handle your own laundry, I choose not to engage in conflict. Instead, I channel my love into crafting your favorite sandwich: peanut butter, honey, and banana on whole wheat. Sometimes, love is expressed without words.
I recognize that being thirteen can be daunting. It often seems that your appearance, possessions, and social media presence define your worth. These are merely fleeting indicators, like a spectacular lightning storm—bright for a moment and then gone. The true essence of who you are will emerge through deeper experiences and meaningful conversations. In the end, your identity will be shaped by your actions, words, and the feelings you evoke in others.
Understanding the distinction between loving someone and being in love with someone is crucial. You will experience this feeling, which can be as liberating as soaring without wings. Your love may not always be reciprocated, leading to heartache and moments of profound loneliness until you discover the gentle love you must cultivate for yourself. Self-love is vital. Strive to remain authentic, to understand your beliefs, feelings, and values. Extend kindness and compassion to yourself and those around you, recognizing that this is a journey that requires practice and perseverance.
Love can diminish but never truly disappears from your heart. Do not discard love, even if it feels distant or forgotten; preserve it for future reflection. I often think back to my high school sweetheart, the way he would meet me at my locker, and how we shared silly smiles dressed in our favorite brands, the scent of his cologne mingling with my own. Those memories are precious, allowing space for both joy and sorrow, reflecting growth and understanding. Learn to differentiate between obsession, infatuation, and true love, even though it may be difficult. Each relationship teaches valuable lessons, but never mistake abuse for love; inflicting pain is never an expression of love.
Your first love—be it for a person, a book, or a band—will always hold a special place in your heart. Just as U2 resonates with me, 5 Seconds of Summer will speak to you. The Mists of Avalon is my beloved classic, much like Divergent is yours. Your experience of love will evolve, at times bursting with passion and at others feeling lackluster. Embrace each moment; find joy in the simplest things, like a raindrop clinging to a blossoming cherry tree, and share that love with the world.
As you continue to grow, my love adapts alongside you. It’s challenging to stand by as you navigate your independence. Some days, it may feel like rebellion, while other days may show you taking initiative and solving problems on your own. The love that once bound us closely is now expanding, creating space between us. Yet, it is this very love that holds me back as you step forward into the world. In a few short years, as you leave home, I will remember the wise words of a musician: if you love someone, set them free. Just remember to carry my love with you.
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In summary, my dear daughter, as you grow and explore the world, remember that love is complex and multifaceted. Embrace it, cherish it, and always find strength in the love that surrounds you.