The third trimester can feel like an exhilarating 13-week journey filled with unexpected twists. As someone who has experienced this phase multiple times, I’ve gathered insights that go beyond the typical pregnancy guides. Prepare yourself with some essentials, and let’s delve into what to expect during this final stretch (besides the impending arrival of your little one).
- You start negotiating with your partner to manage your toenail grooming.
- You find yourself persuading your children to help you put on socks.
- Upon entering a public space, your immediate thoughts are about locating the nearest restroom, quickly followed by how to navigate there with your swollen feet and tender thighs.
- Strangers tend to glance at your belly first, then your eyes, then back again to your belly.
- You will hear a variety of unsolicited comments from well-meaning individuals, including:
- “Are you having twins?”
- “Looks like it could be any day now!”
- “When are you due? Oh, my cousin’s birthday is just after that!”
- And my personal favorite, “I hope what you have isn’t contagious because I’m not ready for that!”
- You wish you could wear a sign that states, “I’m feeling great, due on ____, having a ____, and this is baby # ____. Thanks for not asking!”
- You could probably urinate in a cup blindfolded, even while juggling a squirming toddler and opening a snack bag.
- You regret taking the stairs at your OB appointment, feeling as if you’ve just completed a reality show challenge.
- Your 4-year-old suggests you get back to your pre-pregnancy workout routine.
- Your version of exercise now consists of multiple trips to the fridge and bending to pick up fallen socks. Seriously, why did you decide to have more kids?
- Your wardrobe is dwindling down to just two shirts, both featuring odd elastic details that resemble a pug’s face.
- One shirt is reserved for special occasions like doctor visits, while the other is your everyday option.
- You find yourself calling your grandmother for advice on suitable undergarments.
- The cute maternity swimsuit that seemed like a bargain now feels like a poor choice, making you resemble a well-known marine mammal.
- The local pool has unofficially designated a splash area just for you.
- You are now a firm believer in belly panel pants, which once seemed unnecessary. If pants lack a panel, they’re no good to you now.
- You start gathering your maternity clothes to ceremoniously burn once the baby arrives.
- Your children are reading stories about animals swallowing large objects and are convinced that must have happened to you too.
- You find yourself waking up multiple times a night: once or twice for the restroom, another for a leg cramp, and at least once more for a midnight snack.
- Getting out of bed at night feels like it should be an Olympic event, and you consider using a pole vault for assistance.
- Naps become the most crucial part of your daily routine.
- At your weekly OB visits, nurses greet you with, “Oh, it’s you again! Where’s your pee cup?”
- You secretly wish your doctor would take their time so you can sneak in a quick nap.
- You question if your water broke but realize it was just a sneeze.
- You wonder whether you’re experiencing contractions, but it’s just the aftermath of those late-night snacks.
- You begin to realize you’re growing a new chin each week until your due date.
- Your fingers feel so swollen that your rings might just pop off. It’s best to remove them while you still can.
- You discover that your belly serves as a handy snack table, though this leads to unfortunate stains on your limited wardrobe.
- You ponder why your electricity bill is unusually high and realize it’s because you’ve cranked the A/C down to combat the heat.
- Finally, you dream of a luxurious two-day getaway complete with meals and massages, all while remembering to pack some essentials like Dermoplast and Tucks wipes.
This article offers a humorous yet insightful look at the realities of the third trimester. For more informative content, including insights on home insemination, you can explore our other blog posts here. Additionally, if you’re interested in at-home insemination kits, you can find authoritative resources here.
In summary, the third trimester is a unique phase filled with physical changes, emotional ups and downs, and humorous moments that all contribute to the journey of bringing a new life into the world. For those navigating through this experience, it’s important to embrace the challenges and find humor in the situations that arise. For more information on pregnancy-related resources, check out the CDC’s website here.