As a parent of an only child for five years, I have come to appreciate the unique journey that comes with raising a single child. Initially, I envisioned a larger family, influenced by my own experiences with siblings. Yet, life took unexpected turns, leading my partner and me to embrace our son as our sole child for the time being. As circumstances evolve, I now find myself transitioning to the role of a multi-child parent, but I want to ensure that I remember the challenges faced by those raising only children.
Here is my commitment to parents of an only child:
I vow not to hold myself in higher regard. I will remember the trials and tribulations of raising one child and will refrain from making dismissive comments or condescending remarks such as, “You’ll see!” or “You can’t possibly understand!” I will never suggest that your parenting is any less valid simply because you have one child.
I pledge not to adopt a martyr complex. The decision to expand our family is mine, and I will not project any associated stress onto you. Should I falter and express envy for your single-child scenario or lament about the simplicity of parenting one child, I will do so away from your presence.
I promise not to show weakness in front of you. I will not inquire about your plans for additional children or question your reasons for choosing to remain a family of three. I will avoid implying that your child is missing out or suggesting that they might end up spoiled or lonely. In addition, I will not assume your parenting experience is any less demanding than mine.
You, too, must promise to refrain from saying, “I told you so.”
Parenting is inherently challenging, regardless of the number of children involved. Every parent faces their own set of obstacles, and it requires immense dedication and focus. Despite being part of a parenting community, there often exists unnecessary judgment and competition between parents.
This reality is absurd, especially when we all agree that the true challenge lies in navigating the complexities of raising children.
Additional Resources
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Summary
In this article, a parent of an only child reflects on their commitment to uphold the values of empathy and understanding toward other parents. They emphasize the importance of not judging one another based on family size and acknowledge the unique challenges each parent faces. The piece ends with links to additional resources on fertility and home insemination, promoting continued learning and support within the parenting community.