When my mother experienced her first menstruation at the age of 13, her response from my grandmother was a sharp slap to the face. She explained that such reactions were commonplace “in the old country,” but promised that she wouldn’t treat me in the same manner. Instead, she gifted me a copy of Our Bodies, Ourselves. At just 12 years old, I pored over the black-and-white images in this 1970s classic, absorbing what I could about menstruation, though I must admit, the visuals left a more lasting impression on me than the text.
As a progressive, coffee-loving feminist, I have made a conscious effort to embrace my body and its natural functions. This commitment grew even stronger after the births of my son and daughter. I dedicated time to ensure my little girl would feel comfortable discussing menstruation openly.
Last year, we devised an experiment: each time I started my period, my husband would take the kids out to buy me candy. While the idea originated with me, he was on board.
The rationale was simple: we aimed to normalize the discussion around a topic often considered taboo (the female anatomy) and create positive associations with it—candy, after all, is a universal favorite.
Our Dinner Conversation
At dinner one evening, we casually introduced the subject to our daughter and her eight-year-old brother. My husband and I feigned a nonchalant attitude, as if we were discussing an upcoming playdate.
Me: “I have some good news. I’m on my period.” Husband: “Oh, that’s great! Kids, let’s pick up some chocolate for Mommy after dinner.” Son: “What’s a period?” Me: “It’s like a nosebleed, but from a vagina. It doesn’t hurt.” Son: “So blood comes out of your vagina?” Me: “Exactly! It happens monthly to adult women and teens.” Son: “Oh. [Pause.] I want chocolate, too.” Me: “No problem—I’ll share. Just make sure your dad gets something nice.”
I was encouraged by their response. My daughter listened intently, my son seemed to be on track to become an open-minded individual, and my husband managed to keep his composure throughout the discussion. However, the follow-up comments were somewhat unexpected:
- “Mommy, my nose is having a period!”
- “I got candy because Mommy has blood on her vagina!”
- “Mommy, can we have M&M’s for your period?”
If only these remarks didn’t occur in public, perhaps the situation would be easier to navigate.
Overall, the preliminary outcomes of this initiative are favorable. My children are not squeamish about discussing bodily functions, my husband avoids euphemisms like “Aunt Flo,” and I enjoy plenty of candy. I will provide an update when my daughter reaches adolescence. Until then, I need to find a suitable explanation for why other women in their lives—like teachers, neighbors, or the postal carrier—might not appreciate the offer of “period chocolate.” For those seeking additional insights into home insemination, this article from Make A Mom provides valuable information, as does this resource on what to expect during your first IUI.
Summary
In this article, the author reflects on her family’s candid discussions about menstruation, initiated through a light-hearted experiment involving candy. The conversation aims to normalize the subject within the family while fostering a positive atmosphere around bodily functions. The preliminary results indicate a successful approach, although some humorous misunderstandings arise in public settings.