If you’re a parent, you might not realize it, but you could be experiencing a widespread condition known as Parental Disorder. While it may sound alarming, I’m here to shed light on this relatable phenomenon.
Let’s rewind to a few years back—specifically 2012. Picture this: it’s 8:30 a.m., and I’m confidently dressed in stylish, stain-free clothing, prepared to meet a friend for breakfast before indulging in a shopping spree for unnecessary clothes. Fast forward to 2015, and my morning appearance is quite different.
What has led to this transformation? Aside from my absence from tanning beds (a former indulgence), I’m grappling with Parental Disorder. This condition often results in prioritizing one’s children and household over personal grooming and appearance. Below, I’ve outlined common indicators of this disorder. If any of these resonate with your daily life, you may also be experiencing this condition.
- Oblivious to Modern Lingo
When your partner suggests a “Netflix and Chill” night, you enthusiastically agree, unaware that it has transformed into a euphemism for intimacy. Your partner’s friends may be in the know, but you’re blissfully ignorant. - Inability to Converse After 8 p.m.
When you finally snag a babysitter and attend a social gathering, you find yourself showing off pictures of your kids instead of engaging in adult conversations. As the clock strikes 8 p.m., the allure of your cozy couch and phone videos of your children becomes irresistible. - Car Selection Based on Space and Utility
The thought of purchasing a new vehicle fills you with dread as your only criteria revolve around accommodating kids, strollers, and sports gear. The aesthetic appeal of the car is the least of your worries; you’re more focused on how many little bodies you can fit inside. - Social Media Focused on Your Kids
While your friends share vacation photos and home decor ideas, your social media is flooded with images of your children. Hashtags like #sorrynotsorry and #cutnessoverload dominate your posts, as anything unrelated seems dull and unworthy of sharing. - Excitement for Online Sales
You anticipate online sales events like Amazon Prime Day with the same enthusiasm others reserve for holidays. Marking these dates on your calendar, you prepare for bulk purchases, only to be let down by the quality of the sales. - Preference for Home-cooked Meals
Dining out feels like an uphill battle when dealing with toddlers. A simple dinner at home is much more appealing, especially when you can sneak in a late-night snack after the kids are asleep. - Casual Girls’ Nights
When your friends propose a night out, your heart secretly longs for a cozy evening at home in your pajamas. The thought of high heels and loud bars sounds exhausting, and you’d much prefer a laid-back evening of cards and wine. - Coffee as Your Lifeline
This one needs no explanation. Coffee becomes your essential fuel for navigating the demands of parenting.
If these symptoms resonate with you, you may also be experiencing Parental Disorder. However, there’s no need for concern; research indicates that people with this condition can lead joyful, fulfilling lives. Consider yourself fortunate.
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Summary
Parental Disorder is a common yet overlooked condition affecting many parents, manifesting in various ways like prioritizing children over personal appearance, being out of touch with modern slang, and finding joy in mundane activities. Recognizing these symptoms can help parents understand their experiences better and embrace the joys of parenting.