Updated: Aug. 14, 2015
Originally Published: Jan. 19, 2011
The other night, my nine-year-old daughter, Mia, casually declared, “I asked Dad how you make a baby, but he said you’d be mad at him if he told me.” I was taken aback and honestly unsure of how to respond. (For the record, I would have gladly taken that one for the team!)
“Well, first of all, I wouldn’t be mad at him…” I began, bracing myself for the inevitable conversation. While I had been somewhat anxious about addressing this topic (is that wrong?), I was determined not to avoid it. My kids frequently praised me as the “coolest mom ever,” insisting that they could talk to me about anything. I could handle the words penis and vagina without blushing. I was fairly certain I was ready for this.
“What do you already know about making babies?” I asked, curious if I needed to dispel any playground myths.
Mia replied, “I know there’s a mommy seed and a daddy seed, but I have no idea how they make a baby.” The look of confusion on her face was heartbreaking.
I hugged her tightly and explained, “Okay, here’s how it works: The mommy seed lives inside her tummy, and the daddy seed lives inside… well… him. When they decide they want a baby, the daddy plants his seed in the mommy, and the two parts come together to create a baby.”
To myself: Nailed it! But then I noticed her puzzled expression. “But how does the daddy seed GET to the mommy seed?” she probed.
“Oh. That.” It was just a word; I could say it. “The penis.”
Her face morphed into one of horror. “What about the penis?”
“His seed comes out of his penis.”
“And goes where?”
To myself: You were given this information once, and it didn’t kill you. She can handle it. Just say it and be done with it. “The daddy puts his penis inside the mommy’s vagina so the two seeds can join together.”
Her expression suggested I had just told her I might vomit. “But… why?” she demanded.
“That’s just how it works,” I explained. “It’s a strange system when you really think about it, isn’t it?”
She nodded, looking like a bobblehead on caffeine.
“How long does the penis have to stay in there?” she inquired.
“Not long,” I reassured her, noting her mounting worry.
“I don’t want to do that,” she said, clutching her small stomach.
“Then you don’t have to,” I replied.
She didn’t ask if it hurt, nor did she seem to grasp that her dad and I had obviously done this at least twice. She didn’t even question what happened if the penis accidentally slipped into the vagina when not trying to conceive.
All in all, I considered that conversation a solid win for mom.
If you’re curious about more tips for approaching discussions on conception, check out this insightful article on Cervical Insemination for additional parenting advice. And if you’re looking for reliable resources about at-home insemination, Make A Mom offers excellent syringe kits for your needs. Moreover, for a deeper understanding of the process and success rates, WebMD provides valuable information on insemination techniques.
In summary, navigating the talk about baby-making can be daunting, but with honesty and a bit of humor, you can create an open dialogue with your children. It’s all part of the parenting journey, and I think we’re doing just fine.
Leave a Reply