Being a traveling working mom presents a unique set of challenges, especially with two young children at home. This is a question I encounter frequently, as I typically find myself on the road several days a week while my 4- and 6-year-olds remain at home. If I were to share my candid answer, it might go something like this: “I generally pack my suitcase the night before, head to the airport, park, board the plane, work, fly back, plead with my partner to tackle the laundry, and then begrudgingly start a load myself.” However, I realize that people are not looking for a snarky response; they are interested in the emotional toll and guilt that accompanies leaving one’s family behind.
Indeed, many working parents grapple with feelings of guilt about being away from their children. While I do experience sadness and regret for missed moments, I also view my work as a passion that can positively impact the lives of others. I take the time to explain my role to my children in age-appropriate terms so they understand how I contribute to helping people. To ease the burden of my absence, there are several strategies I employ to maintain family harmony and mental well-being.
1. Supportive Partnership
I am fortunate to have a capable partner who excels in managing our household while I am away. It’s a bittersweet realization that my children have developed a strong bond with their father during my travels. Although I relish being needed by them, it’s liberating to know that their dad can meet their needs just as effectively.
2. Community Support
I have cultivated a network of friends, neighbors, and caregivers who provide invaluable support. We often exchange favors, which has saved us during tight situations. Our children spend so much time with their peers that they likely think of them as family.
3. Flexible Employment
My employer is understanding and allows me to work from home when not traveling. This flexibility enables me to engage with my family in ways that a traditional office job wouldn’t. I find that my most productive work often occurs after my children are asleep, and this arrangement fosters my loyalty to the company.
4. Guarded Schedule
I am protective of my work schedule and only deviate from it for compelling reasons. I take care to plan my commitments in advance, ensuring that I can accommodate important family events. I am willing to explore alternative means of completing work tasks remotely if I can’t travel.
5. Leveraging Technology
I utilize video calls to maintain a connection with my family. Tools like FaceTime allow me to assist with homework, partake in bedtime rituals, and introduce my children to my colleagues. This transparency helps them understand that I am working rather than vacationing without them.
6. Thoughtful Gestures
I often leave notes in my kids’ lunchboxes to remind them that they are in my thoughts. It’s a delightful surprise for them to find these little messages, especially on mornings when I leave for a trip.
7. Quality Family Time
When I am home, I strive to disconnect from digital distractions and focus on my children. Although there are days when the allure of technology is strong, I remind myself to cherish these moments together. On tough days, I forgive myself and strive to be the parent I aspire to be.
8. Involving the Kids
Whenever possible, I bring my children along on work trips, particularly during school breaks. This allows us to create memories together while giving them a glimpse into my professional life.
9. Maintaining Connection with My Partner
My spouse and I make it a priority to communicate effectively while I’m traveling. We work together as a team, especially since we coach the same sports team, ensuring that we are aligned in our parenting approach.
This lifestyle is not suited for everyone, and it certainly has its challenges. I cherish both my career and my family, continually seeking ways to balance the two. Some days are more difficult than others, but I remind myself to be kind and enjoy the journey.
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In summary, being a traveling, working mom is a complex balancing act that requires a supportive network, effective communication, and a commitment to quality time with family. Embracing flexibility and technology can help ease the challenges of this unique lifestyle.