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Parenting
How Can We Encourage Our Children to Embrace New Experiences?
by Jamie Thompson
Updated: July 2, 2020
Originally Published: September 30, 2015
Reflecting on my childhood, I recall a time when my parents made decisions for our family, and we accepted them without question. My siblings and I would eagerly jump into the car, ready to venture wherever our parents decided to take us.
Growing up in Southern California, our dining adventures often took us to places like Tony’s Pizza (where the pizza was reminiscent of cardboard) or Charlie’s BBQ (as cliché as it sounds). These were the go-to spots for the rare occasions our parents chose to treat us to dinner. Sometimes we would even indulge in the all-you-can-eat buffet at Sizzler.
When it came to family vacations, our trips didn’t venture far, but we never voiced any complaints about our destinations. Fear of the unknown repercussions kept us silent, and I still wonder what might have happened had we dared to express our dissatisfaction. Our vacations typically consisted of car rides to popular spots within a five-hour radius of our home. If you’re familiar with the West Coast of the United States, you’ll recognize destinations like Las Vegas, San Diego, Santa Barbara, Palm Springs, and Baja, Mexico—not exactly the luxurious getaways one might envision. I often think that without the photos to remind us, I might not remember these family trips at all.
As a parent myself, I promised my wife that we would never skimp on vacations, dining, or entertainment experiences. Now, with two children—one entering high school and the other in the fourth grade—I find that our elaborate plans often come with a fair share of headaches. Instead of enthusiastic cheers when we share our meticulously planned trips, we are met with a barrage of questions about hotels, activities, and amenities, often followed by protests of, “Can we go somewhere else?”
Currently, as I write this on vacation, I can hear my kids in the hotel room voicing their opinions. We made the decision to drive five and a half hours to Montreal for an end-of-summer trip, and while the journey was manageable, I heard comments about how flying would have been quicker. I felt the urge to justify our choice to save time and money by driving, though I was internally frustrated. Thankfully, the excitement of being in a new country helped us transition to our hotel, which they surprisingly approved of. As we explore this vibrant city, my hopes are to find at least one activity we can all agree on over the next five days without any arguments.
This same scenario plays out with restaurants and nearly every other plan we make, from lunches to movie nights. Having relocated to Southern Connecticut, near New York City—home to many acclaimed but pricey restaurants—my children have had the opportunity to dine at some impressive establishments. By the time they reached five, they had already visited more five-star restaurants than I had during my college years. Although I know they appreciate these culinary experiences, it doesn’t prevent them from debating where we should eat on any given night.
I cherish the fact that my children have been exposed to such remarkable experiences, but I struggle to find a way to encourage them to go along with our plans and to understand that, as parents, we ultimately make the decisions. Perhaps a trip to Tony’s Pizza the next time we’re in California will teach them a lesson.
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Summary
Encouraging children to embrace new experiences can be a challenge for many parents, as kids often have their own preferences and opinions. Reflecting on personal childhood experiences, the hope is to instill in children the understanding that parents make the final decisions regarding outings and adventures. While it can be frustrating to deal with constant questioning and pushback, exposure to new experiences is invaluable for children’s growth and appreciation of diverse opportunities.