Dear Friends in the North,
You know who you are. Today, you woke up with a sense of excitement as the morning air hinted at a chill (even if it was only in your imagination). “There’s something different in the air,” you probably thought, and shared that revelation with everyone online, ensuring the world knew that autumn was on its way.
As you reached for your sweaters, your mind filled with thoughts of cozy evenings, football games, vibrant foliage, and the start of a new academic year. And of course, the much-anticipated pumpkin spice lattes. You made sure to announce your love for fall to the Internet, tagging it with #PSL.
I need to confess something, and it may feel a bit awkward since we’re friends. But I must be honest—I’m feeling a strong sense of resentment.
Now, don’t panic; it’s temporary. By mid-November, when your autumn leaves have become soggy messes and your sweaters are looking worse for wear, I’ll be ready to reconnect. Until then, I find myself harboring a profound annoyance toward you and your fall-loving crew. I believe I speak for many of my friends who thrive in warmer climates when I say this:
- When you pin images of leather boots and scarves on a Pinterest board labeled “Fall Favorites,” we feel a twinge of jealousy. We may re-pin those images, but we know our boots won’t make an appearance until late October at the earliest—if they even can stand the heat.
- When you share recipes for pumpkin-flavored everything—from pancakes to cocktails to potpourri—we experience a mix of envy and frustration, feeling as though we’re being smothered in a pumpkin-apple-cinnamon blend.
- When your Instagram feed fills with unfiltered photos of trees ablaze with color, we wish we could scream into our steering wheels—if only they weren’t so scorching hot.
- When you brag about the smell of homemade applesauce wafting from your kitchen after a day of apple-picking, we’re stuck cranking the A/C in our homes while cursing the meteorologist’s endless reports of triple-digit temperatures.
- When you dress your children in coordinating long-sleeve pumpkin-themed outfits for that perfect fall photo op, we’re applying sunscreen and arriving at the pumpkin patch before dawn to escape the heat. Sure, we still enjoy the hayrides and petting zoos, but that’s only because our kids have been deprived of outdoor play for months.
- When you proudly don your alma mater’s gear, sipping spiked cider while cheering from the stands, we’re inside, wishing we were anywhere else.
- And when you post a snapshot of your inaugural pumpkin spice latte of the season, we’re filled with an odd mix of disdain for the crisp air, the spice-scented ambiance, the chili recipes, the touchdowns, and those shorter days. Yet, despite our feelings, we’ll still order our own #PSL and share it online, albeit with a touch of resentment.
But let’s be clear, this isn’t entirely your fault. I understand that next spring, when I share photos of my kids frolicking in the sprinklers and tweet about my sunburn after a day at a spring-training game, you’ll probably feel a hint of that same irritation. But for now, I’m afraid I can’t help but feel this way.
There’s a reason you’ll never find an iced pumpkin spice latte on the Starbucks menu: it simply embodies bitter frustration.
Until November,
Your friend in a warmer climate.
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Summary
This letter humorously captures the feelings of someone living in a warmer climate as their friends in the North celebrate the arrival of autumn. The author expresses a mix of jealousy and annoyance towards the seasonal festivities and trends that seem to dominate social media during this time. However, the tone is light-hearted, acknowledging that these feelings are temporary and will shift as the seasons change.