As the landscape of communication evolves, it’s essential to recognize how informal interactions are becoming the norm, especially among children. The rise of social media and texting has ushered in a new era of casual exchanges. While I appreciate the benefits of a more relaxed communication style—like skipping unnecessary pleasantries and getting straight to the point—I still hold a fondness for traditional etiquette, particularly when it comes to how children address adults.
One of my greatest concerns is the trend of kids calling adults by their first names. Although it’s common these days, it feels inherently wrong to me, akin to mismatched fashion choices. For instance, my name is Emily, and whenever a child refers to me by that name, I can’t help but think of the song by The Ting Tings: “They call me hell. They call me Emily. They call me her. They call me Jane. That’s not my name. That’s not my name.” Once that tune gets lodged in your mind, it can derail your entire day, trust me.
I often wonder if my discomfort with this trend is unique. Many parents express a preference for first-name familiarity, believing it fosters a youthful connection, while others reminisce about their own childhoods when “Mr.” or “Mrs.” felt more appropriate. I can understand the sentiment, yet I can’t shake the feeling that a certain boundary should exist between adults and children.
As I ponder what my kids’ friends should call me, I consider a few alternatives. Some suggest using “Miss” or “Mr.” alongside a first name, but “Miss Emily” carries a certain connotation that feels dated. In my quest for a modern solution, I even contemplated adopting a stage name, but the options I brainstormed—like “G-Em” or “MC Em”—just didn’t resonate.
The reality is that being on a first-name basis is a privilege that should be reserved for peers. We are not friends, and the reasons are clear:
- We won’t be sharing a drink at the local bar.
- I’m not going to ask you for your famous recipe.
- Our conversations won’t involve discussing our partners.
- Friendship would require me to navigate social media, which I am not prepared for.
To clarify the appropriate way to address me, here’s a quick reference guide. If you:
- Have soiled your trousers in the last decade—nope.
- Are wearing something from a children’s clothing store—definitely no.
- Play on a travel soccer team—enjoy the season, but still no.
- Count candy as a food group—no.
- Can recite more than ten lines from a kid’s movie—sorry, still no.
- Order from the children’s menu—no.
- Received a discount ticket to a theme park—no way.
- Own light-up sneakers—absolutely not.
- Are looking forward to Santa’s arrival—ho ho no.
Thank you for understanding (from the mom formally known as Emily). Please don’t take offense; I’m not even on a first-name basis with my physician, and we’ve had many intimate encounters.
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In summary, while casual communication has its place, maintaining a level of respect and formality in how children address adults is essential for preserving boundaries and etiquette in our evolving social landscape.