In my earlier years, I categorized parents who employed spanking as a form of discipline into two distinct groups—those who lacked faith and those who were overly religious. The secular advocates of spanking often defended their approach by citing their upbringing, proclaiming, “Look at me; I turned out fine, and my kids will be fine too.” I often thought to myself, “Oh really? You seem more like an emotionally stunted individual than a well-adjusted adult.” Instead of confronting them, I would simply roll my eyes and walk away, convinced that my parenting style, centered on reasoning and time-outs, was far superior. My children, I believed, would never experience the confusion that arises when a loved one inflicts pain.
Equally troubling were the fervent believers who distorted religious texts to justify their need to spank. They claimed it was a divine order, a necessity to correct a child’s sinful tendencies. I was often too shy to voice my disbelief but thought, “How can a compassionate deity endorse such punitive measures?”
However, my perspective shifted dramatically when I became pregnant. The surge of hormones transformed me into someone who openly voiced opinions on everything—particularly on parenting practices. I found myself frequently debating with my sister-in-law, whom I playfully nicknamed “Ms. Spanky McSpankerson.” I inundated her with articles and studies on the detrimental effects of spanking, feeling quite self-righteous in my approach.
Then came the birth of my son. From the outset, he was colicky, and as he grew, his disposition shifted from a constant cry to a relentless whine over the minutiae of life—dinner temperature, clothing length, and even the taste of yogurt. Following the whine phase, he entered what some might label “strong-willed,” which was merely a euphemism for defiance.
We attempted various strategies to correct his behavior, from stern discussions to time-outs. Yet, nothing seemed to resonate. He laughed in the face of reason, seemingly unfazed by consequences. The situation escalated until, one day, he slapped me across the face. I realized then that I had entered a new realm of parenting—a realm where one might resort to methods passed down through generations.
In that moment, all my carefully constructed beliefs about nurturing through love and logic shattered. Without hesitation, I turned him over, administered a firm but measured spank, and stated, “You will not hit mommy. This is disrespectful. I am in charge here.” He cried, stunned and scared, while I too felt a wave of trepidation. We shared a brief cuddle afterward, and I reassured him of my love. To my relief, he bounced back quickly, and though he retained his strong will, he learned to respect boundaries.
My perception of parents who spank has changed. I now view them not as abusers but as individuals navigating the challenges of raising spirited children, perhaps even feeling a bit overwhelmed.
For those exploring similar experiences, you might find insights on home insemination through our other blog posts, like this one here, or check out authoritative sources on the subject, such as this guide on artificial insemination kits. For comprehensive information about pregnancy, visit Healthline for valuable resources.
In summary, parenting is a complex journey, and as we evolve in our understanding of discipline, it’s essential to remain open to new perspectives while considering the unique needs of our children.