During my pregnancy, I envisioned the early days of motherhood filled with serene moments: a well-managed labor, seamless breastfeeding, and a swift return to my pre-baby body. However, the reality of motherhood is often chaotic, unpredictable, and filled with choices that may not be widely accepted. Here are the aspects of my first year of motherhood that I stand by without regret (and you should too).
1. Electing a C-Section
The narrative surrounding unnecessary C-sections is misleading. Trust me, they aren’t just handed out casually at the doctor’s office. I specifically requested one due to my son being in a Frank breech position, which caused me immense discomfort. Despite my pleas for an earlier procedure, my water broke at 38 weeks, and I was relieved to finally be free of the physical burden, although I hadn’t fully grasped the enormity of the surgery that awaited me.
Having a C-section was not an easy option; I endured a significant medical procedure while under immense stress. My son was born healthy, and I recognize that a vaginal birth was not an option for me. I do not have regrets about my birth experience, except perhaps wishing I had received the C-section sooner.
2. Choosing Formula Feeding
While breastfeeding is lauded, there seems to be a lack of support for those who choose or need to formula feed. I firmly believe that the priority should be feeding the baby, whatever method that entails. Despite my initial efforts, I was unable to produce milk due to medical reasons, a fact that no one addressed until I had already transitioned to formula. Bottle feeding turned out to be a wonderful bonding experience for my husband and me, allowing him to participate in nighttime feedings and for me to focus on healing. I have no regrets about this choice.
3. Implementing Cry It Out
At just 13 days old, we transitioned our son to his own crib to establish a routine, following the “Moms On Call” method. He adapted well, and by 10 weeks, he was sleeping through the night. This technique, which includes brief intervals of crying, has worked for us. Our son has always gone down while still awake, and I do not apologize for the approach we’ve taken.
4. My Husband’s Involvement in Bath Time
Bath time and bedtime have been my husband’s responsibility since our son was born. I specifically requested that he prioritize this time with our child, understanding the importance of their bond. It allows me the opportunity to focus on other tasks or simply take a breather. I believe this arrangement benefits our whole family, and I have no qualms about it.
5. Traveling Without the Baby
Parenting can put a strain on a marriage, and taking time away for ourselves has been beneficial. When we travel without our son, we reconnect and remember our partnership. Each time we go away, I face judgment about leaving him behind, but it’s essential for us to maintain our relationship. Our son learns that he is loved and safe, and we plan to continue this practice for our well-being.
In conclusion, these choices reflect what works for my family. We are healthy, happy, and thriving, and I stand firm in my decisions.
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Summary: This article discusses the author’s unapologetic stance on various motherhood choices such as opting for a C-section, formula feeding, crying it out, and the importance of personal time for parents. It emphasizes the need for support and acceptance of diverse parenting decisions.